In the Beginning
by mipela
Summary: An alternative take on how our special couple got together. More Kate and Caroline, less angst and less interference.
1. Chapter 1

_Ok Yes I know I said I was done. Well this came tumbling out and I've been sitting on it for a while not wanting to look daft by publishing again - but what the hell - can't help it!_

 **In the beginning**

Caroline threw her pen down on the desk and spat out some venomous words about the colleague that Kate had just complained about. She knew that her nerves were frayed and she was emotionally exhausted, this was the straw that broke the proverbial camel's back. "I'm sorry Kate, that was rather unprofessional."

"Are you alright Caroline?"

Gentle, enquiring and surprisingly welcome words reached Caroline's tattered emotions.

"Yes, I am; actually, no not really." She began to cry; she swallowed hard, and looked at the table in an effort to avoid the caring and compassionate eyes that were staring at her. "It's personal, it's my marriage; it's over." It was out, no taking it back now; she had told someone, apart from her secretary, for the first time. Why choose this woman she thought to herself? It wasn't hard to answer that question. She had often found her gaze drifting to Kate at assembly or in meetings, walking in the corridors; she was beautiful outside and in. Her colleagues greatly admired her; the kids loved her teaching and she was a person people went to for advice and solace.

"I'm so sorry to hear that Caroline, it's a difficult time. Is there anything I can do? Would you like to chat? I've been through it myself and it helped me to talk things through with someone not directly involved."

There was no response immediately. Caroline was struggling to decide if it would be appropriate in her position to disclose all her sordid details to a colleague. She wanted to, God she wanted to.

Kate was aware of the difficulty of such an offer. "I can be very discrete; but I also understand if it isn't comfortable for you."

Caroline sat for some moments with her face in her hands; then she looked up at this lovely woman sitting across the table from her and took perhaps the greatest gamble of her life so far; "Would you like to come and have a cup of tea with me somewhere?"

"Yes, yes I would;" the simple reply.

"Ok I'll meet you in the car park in ten minutes and we'll decide where to go."

Kate hopped into Caroline's car after moving hers to the street, so as not to get locked in the school grounds. They had decided to go somewhere away from the possibility of bumping into students or parents. They drove to a small village a few miles away and found a lovely cafe. After ordering tea and scones, they settled back into the winged armchairs in front of a lovely open fire.

"Caroline, tell me as much or as little as you want, or nothing if that suits you today."

"You need to understand Kate; this is out of character for me. I'm a fairly private person and anyway this whole sorry saga is something I didn't see coming and I feel very foolish and somewhat out smarted by my idiot husband. I thought my life was stable, my kids are good, I have a great job that I enjoy, a beautiful home that I could only dream of and what passed for a reasonable marriage."

The tea came and Kate immediately took over and poured a cup for Caroline; "would you like me to jam and cream a scone for you?" Caroline nodded. Such a simple yet intimate gesture; it felt strangely right and comfortable. They settled into conversation over their afternoon tea; time passed as Caroline poured out all the heartache of the last few months; the lies, the cheating and the final split.

Out of the corner of her eye, Kate noticed the staff looking expectantly in their direction. She realised they were the only two customers left and it was actually past their stated closing time. Caroline seemed unstoppable once she'd started. "Caroline, I think they're waiting to close up."

"Oh gosh, yes I'm sorry." They headed for the till, paid the bill and apologised for losing track of time.

It was almost completely dark by now. They drove back to Kate's car in a comfortable silence. Once there, Caroline turned the engine off and turned to face her. "Thank you, it was kind of you to give me all this time. I'm sure you have a million and one things you could have been doing."

"No. I can't think of anything more important than spending this time with you. I'd like to imagine that I could be a friend to you and help you through this."

Caroline put her hand over Kate's in an intended gesture of gratitude. Neither woman could have foreseen what they felt in that moment. It was a touch that was more than hand on hand; more than superficial; it found its way inside and like a flint, ignited a spark.

After Kate had driven off Caroline stayed there for a few moments, and drifted back to the time she had felt something like this before; her first real sexual awakening. Sarah was a post graduate student. She was a tall, lean, auburn haired beauty and Caroline had felt an instant attraction for her which had quickly turned to lust she was afraid to say. The attraction had proved to be mutual and a relationship had started. For Caroline it was love at first sight; she had grown ever more dependent on and could hardly bear to be away from her, to the point where she believed that this was what she wanted for the rest of her life. However, for Sarah it seemed it was just another conquest and after a couple of months she had dispensed with Caroline and taken up a new attraction. She recalled this was the time she had gone home from Oxford so upset and had confided in her mother, who of course had steered her back on to what she thought was the 'right path'.

She shook the memory from her mind and drove home. Her kids were already there and immediately accosted her about the time and the fact that she hadn't begun to start their evening meal. Feeding two hungry teenagers and dealing with their everyday chatter took Caroline's mind away from the previous couple of hours; temporarily that is.

Kate sat down and looked at the meal she had prepared. She actually wasn't hungry; the scones, she told herself, that's what's filled me up. The scones were actually insignificant in comparison to the stirrings she felt when she closed her eyes and recalled Caroline's face, her tears, the touch of her hand. That's what was stifling her appetite. She grinned and told herself she was behaving like a love struck teenager. She wished she'd asked for Caroline's mobile number, you know just in case she ever needed to contact her; 'I must do that tomorrow' she told herself out loud.

Lying on her bed waiting for sleep, it occurred to Caroline that she could text Kate and thank her for being so concerned and so nice. She too realised she didn't have her number. 'Something to do tomorrow' she mumbled.

The next day, Kate toyed with the idea of going to see Caroline and explicitly asking for her number, however she thought better of it and sent her an email asking if she would mind. It was returned within minutes with the number and a request for hers.

The after work cups of tea and coffee became a regular thing a couple of days a week and then on one occasion, Caroline asked if Kate would like to have dinner instead, she knew a discrete little restaurant not far that did exceptional food.

She booked a table for the Friday evening. She stared out of the window of her office and wondered if the feeling she had was similar to the anticipation of a date. She smiled, shook her head and told herself to grow up; however the spark she had felt when she touched Kate's hand remained. It was a little troubling but illicit and exciting.

They met at the restaurant at seven. There had been no suggestion of either picking the other one up; that was a bridge too far at this point. Both women had obviously taken the time to look good and dress to attract. "You look very nice." Caroline said to Kate across the table. "You scrub up pretty well yourself." They ordered their food; it was so long since Caroline had actually been out for dinner, except with family, longer than she cared to remember. Kate was impressed with the menu. "The food here is excellent; I didn't know this place existed."

"Yes, I've been here a few times with colleagues from other schools. Do you live far from here Kate?"

"No actually I'm about a fifteen minute drive away; I have a small cottage on Hollows Lane." There she thought, now you know where I live. Kate waited to see of there would be a reciprocal response.

"Oh I know that area a little. My place is about a twenty minute drive from there in Conway Drive. Do you mind me asking how long you've been divorced Kate?"

"No not at all; more than three years now. My ex husband and I sold our home and I bought the cottage. He moved to London, a new job and new life. I came here, new job and new life."

"Right, right." Caroline felt a secret lifting of her spirits. So she was single and not living with anyone. It was looking hopeful. "Well of course you know my situation, my ex is shacked up with someone else and I'm at home with William and Lawrence."

"William's about to go to University isn't he?" Kate enquired.

"Yes he'll be gone in September and Lawrence will go into sixth form. It's hard to believe they're the age they are. I'm lucky they're both good kids and have made life relatively easy; that is until now. Lawrence has taken his father's leaving quite hard. There's a bit of acting out going on I'm afraid."

They chatted on easily for the next couple of hours. It did strike Kate that it was mostly about Caroline but she was happy to go with the flow. She knew that if this friendship, or dare she think any other kind of relationship, were to grow it would have to be at Caroline's pace and within her comfort zone; at least for the time being, as she had more to protect than Kate.

They reluctantly left the restaurant and walked to where they had parked their cars. Kate's was the first one they came to.

"Thanks so much for inviting me out tonight Caroline. I've really enjoyed it, both the meal and the company."

"Oh heavens, you're very welcome. I've had a lovely night too. I hope you enjoy the rest of your weekend and I'll see you on Monday." She stepped forward and kissed Kate on the cheek. It was soft and gentle but there was a momentary linger. Kate soaked up the feel of her lips and the smell of her perfume.

As Caroline lay in bed that night she reflected on the evening and on the woman she had spent it with. She realised that there were things going on inside her that she had not felt since she had her first encounter with Sarah. Her love life with John had been as normal as she thought it should be, passionate at first and then a comforting and relaxing intimacy. However, looking back she realised that there was always an element missing; a strong and deep emotional connection. She had felt that with Sarah, but had put the difference down to youthful lust, but the feelings that were stirring inside her these past few weeks were taking her back to those times.

Suddenly her phone vibrated on the bedside table; she reached out and looked at the message. 'Thinking of you, thanks again. Sleep well. Kate'

She smiled to herself; this is lovely. 'Me too, sleep well. Caroline.' She looked at the empty side of her queen sized bed and allowed herself to imagine Kate being there; it excited her to the point where she was contemplating things that it was far too soon to think of.

Not having had a relationship since her husband, Richard, Kate too was imagining all kinds of scenarios and having a great debate with herself about the wisdom of pursuing anything with her boss. It could prove to be a disaster.

A few days into the following week, Caroline called down the corridor at work, "Kate, could you come to my office for a moment please?" Kate excused herself from the colleague she was walking with and followed her boss.

"I've been asked to give the opening address at an education conference in Edinburgh next month."

"Wow that's an honour Caroline, congratulations."

"Thanks, but the reason I am telling you is that I was wondering if you would like to join me? It's over a weekend. I'm speaking on the Friday evening followed by a conference dinner and then my job is over."

"Oh wow well I think that would be a lovely idea but aren't there people from here going too?"

"No, oh no, this is for Principals and University lecturers. I know only a couple of other folk by name; they are doing workshops."

"Ok well yes then. How we will work it?"

"Well I was going to catch the train up on Friday lunchtime and then hire a car for the weekend. All the accommodation is paid for and they said partners were welcome."

Both women stood open mouthed at the statement Caroline had just made.

"Oh my God Kate, I'm sorry, that came out badly, I meant to say that you wouldn't have to worry about accommodation if you're comfortable sharing with me."

Kate put her hand on Caroline's arm. "It's OK no problem, I can share with you."

"Right then; if you put in a leave application saying that you are attending a meeting for school business, I'll sign off on you having the afternoon off. Leave all the arrangements to me, is that Ok?"

"That's very OK. Oh, and while I'm here, are you free any night this weekend? Would you like to come round to my place and I'll cook us a meal; we can just have a laid back lazy night in with a glass of wine and a good movie if you want."

"Yep and yep! How about Saturday night? I think the kids have both got stuff on. Lawrence is with his dad and William is staying over at a friend's place."

"Right then, I'll see you Saturday about six?"

With that Kate walked out and back to the staff room; there was an enormous spring in her step and a wide smile on her face. Both kids away from home she mused, the words 'staying over' also toyed with her excited emotions.

Saturday evening arrived and Kate answered the doorbell. Caroline stood on the step, dressed casually in her jeans, bottle in hand and a rather larger than usual handbag. There was a brief kiss on the cheek for each of them as had become their habit.

"Come in, it's good to see you." Kate ushered her into the sitting room. Caroline allowed her eyes to roam around the room and she was struck by the simple elegance of the place, it felt welcoming and homely.

"Sit down, and I'll go and get us a drink." Kate disappeared into the kitchen and came back a few moments later with a tray of nibbles and the opened bottle. She poured them a glass and invited Caroline to help herself to the food. Over the last few months they had developed a real ease with one another and there was obvious affection growing between them. Separately both women were happy at the pace their friendship was developing but they also knew within themselves, it wasn't where they wanted it to stop. It was all about timing, and for Kate, it was about Caroline making the first move.

Over the lovely meal that Kate had made, they talked about the up-coming conference and what the opening address would be. Caroline threw out some ideas and asked Kate what she thought and did she have any suggestions. It was an animated discussion and opened her up to Kate's wisdom and intelligence. After cleaning up they went back to the lounge and Kate offered to open another bottle. The idea of a movie had gone out of the window as they had talked for so long.

"Well, if you're offering to open another bottle, I have a decision to make; if I'm driving home then don't for me as I can't drink anymore; or if you insist then I can't drive home."

This was it; this was the moment Kate had been waiting for. Caroline had made a suggestion that they both knew was about something else other than whether she would drink more. It was about whether she would stay. The bulging handbag had earlier led Kate to think that she had come prepared.

She looked at Caroline searchingly and then slowly but determinedly opened the bottle and poured them both another glass.

"Does this mean I'm staying?" Caroline could hardly get the words out; she was being sucked into something here that she had longed for but was terrified of.

"Yes, I'd like that and I think we're both old enough and wise enough to know that I'm not talking about my spare room."

"Oh thank God, I'm allergic to spare rooms; I could even go into anaphylactic shock."

"Hey don't joke about that, I have a peanut allergy remember?"

Kate patted the sofa for Caroline to come and sit beside her. Their hands slowly but surely slipped into the grip of the other's. Hearts started to pound; eyes met; bodies began to stir and without a word they leaned into each other and kissed gently; once, then again and then more urgently. Kate pulled back, "Caroline are you sure about this? You are the one with the most to protect, your job, your family."

"I trust you; anyway I'm at the point where it is starting to matter less and less what other people might think."

Clothes were slowly removed each from the other and, after more kissing and stroking, Kate pulled Caroline up off the sofa and led her upstairs. At first everything was tentative and exploratory but soon they were overwhelmed by the intensity of their feelings and desires. Both women asked if what they were doing was ok for the other and they gently guided each other to what pleasured them, what brought them to climax.

Their love making seemed to have no beginning and no end, it just kept on giving and their enjoyment increased the more familiar they became.

Kate looked at the clock; three thirty. "Caroline, it's already after three we should get some sleep."

"I've been sleeping for five months;" she rolled Kate over into her arms and whispered. "Thank you, this is so beautiful, you're so beautiful." And began to cry.

Kate cradled her and felt an enormous need to be protective; the woman who was so on top of things at school, trying to keep her family together; right now she needed to be cared for and nurtured.

"Caroline."

"Yes."

"I think I love you; no I don't think; I do love you." She put her finger against Caroline's lips to stop her from saying anything. "But I can wait for the right moment for you."

Caroline removed the finger. "Kate, I'm only in your arms because I know it's what I want, because I know I love you."

Nothing else was said and slowly they both drifted off to sleep, content, happy and feeling like this was just the beginning.

 **The Conference**

The two women settled into their seats and the train pulled out heading for Edinburgh. Kate had hardly slept the night before, they had not been together for the night since her place a couple of weeks before but had both spoken of how much they were looking forward to some alone time over the weekend.

"What time does your address start, Caroline?"

"Six thirty followed by pre dinner drinks and then the meal at seven thirty. I've booked you in for the evening session and conference dinner. I'd really value your feedback on how you think the talk goes."

"Sure, and if I may ask, what about the room situation?"

"Ah, well I've booked one room for both of us. I didn't give your name, they just asked if my partner would be with me and I said yes. I left it at that. I'm assuming, actually hoping that we will have a lovely big bed in a secluded part of the hotel. I intend to make a lot of noise!"

Kate turned to her and grinned. "I'm sure I can facilitate that,"

They approached the check-in desk and a friendly young woman asked for Caroline's details. Ah yes, Dr Elliot, one of our keynote speakers. You have a lovely junior suite on the fourth floor. Could you please fill in your details here and you husband's."

"My husband isn't with me, Ms McKenzie, here, is sharing my room."

"Oh, I'm sorry; would you prefer a twin room? I can arrange that very quickly?"

"Nope, no thank you," No further comment.

Suddenly the penny dropped for the receptionist, she grinned, a knowing grin, and continued with the check-in.

As they got in the lift they fell about laughing as they thought about the slow dawning of the situation for the receptionist. "Poor kid," Caroline said.

Their room was indeed very nice; it even had a small balcony and as they stood on it together they could see the castle illuminated on the hill. "This is lovely Caroline, thank you so much."

"Well, I'm sure it'll prove to be the best conference I've ever been too! Now come on we need to get ready, there's only half an hour before I have to give my talk."

They both stood staring at each other and the sheer elegance of the way they looked. Each had made a special effort, Caroline in her professional capacity and Kate because she wanted Caroline to be proud to be seen with her.

"You look gorgeous, wow," Caroline whispered in Kate's ear. "We'd better get out of this room or I fear I'll have to put in an apology for not appearing."

They walked into the conference room and were shown to their seats. Kate had been seated next to Caroline in the reserved spots. A few moments later the convenor walked up on to the stage and began to open the conference; after welcoming everyone, she invited Caroline to come up and give her address. As she introduced her, there were things on her resume that Kate had no idea she had achieved; it made her heart swell with pride; even more so knowing that this amazingly talented woman loved her; loved her very much.

The speech was impressive, even though she had listened to it a few times as Caroline practised, she knew that it had been polished up and if the audience was anything to go by, it was exceptionally well received.

Everyone walked into the dining room; probably a hundred participants in all were seated. Caroline and Kate were placed on the table with some of the other presenters. As the evening wore on, they became more relaxed; no-one had directly asked where Kate fitted into the picture and she was certainly able to hold her own amongst the academia. However what they were both secretly longing for was the moment when they could comfortably remove themselves and be alone.

As their room door closed behind them, Caroline pushed Kate up against the back of it and kissed her passionately. "Now the real weekend starts." Kate guided her backwards and gently steered her to the bed, falling on top of her. They began to peel off their clothes, dresses, shoes, underwear flying in all directions; giggling like love struck youngsters as they went. Suddenly there was a knock at the door. "Christ who's that?" Caroline said as she jumped up, grabbing one of the hotel bathrobes and throwing the other at Kate. She opened the door and Kate heard a gasp as Caroline said, "What the hell?"

"Hi, I hope you don't mind I asked the desk for your room number, told them you'd left your wrap at the table and I would bring it to you."

"John, what are you doing here?" she carefully pulled the door closed as far as she could.

He lifted his hands and there was a bottle and two glasses, "I thought we could share a nightcap for old time sake and catch up on what's been happening."

"Yes well I'm afraid this isn't a good time, I was just about to take a shower and have an early night. It's been a busy day."

"Surely you could manage to give me half an hour Caroline, I don't mind if you're not dressed, in fact I'd quite like it;"he grinned in a sleazy kind of way.

"Caroline, are you OK; who is it; what's going on?" Kate asked in a concerned tone.

"Who the hell is in there with you Caroline?

"My colleague, not that it's any of your business anyway." Kate walked over and opened the door. She looked at the man standing at there and it didn't take more than a few seconds for her to realise who it was. John looked over her shoulder and saw all the clothes strewn around the floor; it didn't take him more than a few seconds to know what he was seeing.

"John, I think it would be best if you left, this is not appropriate, they shouldn't have given you my room number to start with."

"What's going on Caroline? This looks a lot like you and she are well you know 'at it'."

Kate was enraged by this statement; she wasn't about to let Caroline or their relationship be belittled. "Do you mind? You heard what she said this is a bad time. Now I'm asking you to leave or I will call hotel security."

"Oooooh, she's rather sassy Caroline, scored a good one here eh?"

Now it was Caroline's turn to be angry on behalf of her lover, "Yes well, believe me second time around, the quality, not to mention the quantity, is much better."

John was humiliated by this comment and turned to slink away down the corridor. He looked back at Caroline, he wanted to tell her that his new found relationship was well and truly over, but the door was closed and he heard the click of it being double locked; there was no mistaking the large 'do not disturb' sign on the door handle.

"God Kate, I'm so sorry I had no idea he would be here; they must have sent him from the University where he lectures."

"Hey, not your fault, he's got some bloody cheek coming up here to disturb you, us. Come on, don't let it bother you. Now where were we?"

They walked back over to the bed and rid themselves of the matching robes, sliding under the sheets together. Caroline was overwhelmed by the feelings she experienced; Kate had taken hold of her mind and heart like she couldn't believe. This was more than an affair, it was a lifetime prospect, however it played out; even at this early stage, it was hard to imagine not being with her. Their night was filed with passion, loving and enjoyment such as neither had experienced for some years. Sleep was deep and restful as their bodies curled around each other and held on tightly.

After showering and getting ready they made their way down to the dining room for breakfast; they had planned the day out and were keen to get on and start their sightseeing. As they ate, discussing their day, basking in their enjoyment of the night, a familiar figure walked up to the table with a plate of breakfast. "Do you mind if I join you?"

"Well actually, I do John and in any case we are just about to finish and head out for the day."

"Oh so you're not attending the rest of the conference Caroline?"

"Nope, I was only expected for the opening speech; Kate and I are going to spend the rest of the weekend relaxing and enjoying the city."

John turned to face Kate, "Oh so you're name is Kate? We haven't been formally introduced, I'm John Elliot." He reached out his hand to shake hers; she simply nodded and said, "Yes I know who you are."

"You're a friend of Caroline's then?" Kate opened her mouth to answer, Caroline interjected; "Kate's my partner." A wide grin broke out across Kate's face as the colour drained from Johns.

"Your partner, what's that supposed to mean?"

"Exactly what I said; if it's too difficult for you to grasp, we're an item, a permanent one."

He put his plate down on the table and slumped into one of the chairs, put his head in his hands for a few moments and then looked up at Caroline. "How long has this been going on?"

"It's none of your business and I have no intention of discussing anything with you. You know that our marriage has been well and truly over for some time now and we are just waiting for the divorce to come through. I've moved on, you need to."

"Caroline, I'll leave you two to chat for a while and meet you back in our room."

"OK I won't be long." Kate left them and as she got into the lift, she felt her joy and excitement slowly being taken over by a sense that life was about to get complicated.

"I don't understand, Caroline. I asked the kids not long ago and they told me you weren't seeing anyone."

"Well that's because they didn't know. I've been with Kate for a few months now but we have been taking things slowly and working out what we both wanted."

"And now, have you worked it out?"

"Oh yes I have. This is it for me John, I love her, she loves me and we are good together, good friends and wonderful lovers."

"Okay, Okay you don't have to spell it out." He moaned. "I just thought, seeing you appeared to be still unattached, and I have ended my sordid affair, we might have a chance at reconciling our differences and moving on together. Are you at least open to discussing it Caroline; please?"

"No, no, I'm sorry that's out of the question. I want to be with Kate, she wants to be with me; that's it I'm afraid, I couldn't imagine not being with her now. I'm very much in love."

With that, she stood up and said goodbye, moving quickly out of his sight and up to the room so that she could collect Kate and get out of there.

"Kate darling, I'm so sorry about all this, I had no idea he was going to be here."

"What does he want; I thought it was all over?"

"As far as I'm concerned it is. It appears however that his affair has ended and he's looking to come back to me. I told him it was out of the question, I'm with you now and it's what I want. I can't imagine not being with you and I have no interest in him."

"How did he take it?"

"He's upset but that's not our problem. Come on let's get out of here and start enjoying our day."

 **Edinburgh.**

They strolled through the streets together, taking in all the sights; visiting the Castle and having lunch on the Royal Yacht. Occasionally they would allow their hands to brush together, each wishing they were brave enough to just walk along hand in hand. In the afternoon it began to rain and so they decided to go back to the hotel and relax. They bought a bottle of wine and some good cheese and biscuits for later in case they didn't feel like leaving their room.

They lay on the bed and began to talk about what was ahead of them.

"Caroline, where do we go from here? I think we've established that this is more than a friendship or even a fling, and I suspect for you, as it is for me, the real deal."

"I couldn't imagine getting on in life without you, it's like you've always been here; I feel so at home and happy. It's not going to be a smooth ride because I have baggage that has to be negotiated. What about you, how do think your family are going to cope?"

"Honestly, I can't see there being a problem. My mum is very open minded. "

"When we get back, I'll sit the kids down and have a talk with them and then as soon as I feel they're coping, I'll arrange for you to come over and spend the weekend."

"Maybe just dinner first, Caroline, even if they are open to the relationship, it doesn't mean they'll like me just because you love me."

Those words, 'you love me' caused Caroline to feel a lump in her throat; she was so overwhelmed that Kate could say that so naturally as if it had been years.

Suddenly Caroline's phone vibrated; she picked it up and saw that it was a message from William. 'Mum, just spoke to Dad, what's going on? '

She showed the message to Kate, saying as she did, "Jesus is there no end to this man's intrusion into my life?" Kate put the phone down and reached out to Caroline. "There's nothing we can't get through together, with time; as long as we are solid."

"Rock solid." The simple reply.

By noon the next day they were on the train home. Parting and going their separate ways at the station was hard as the weekend had served to show them that they were relaxed and content being together. "I'll call you when I get home darling, I'm going to try to have a conversation with the kids; I can't let this drag on."

As she drove away alone, Kate reflected on the easy way loving words seemed to be trickling out of each other. 'Darling' it had come so naturally, so sincerely, as if it had been coming out for years.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Thanks for the encouragement.**_

 **Chapter Two - Getting Home**

Caroline arrived home and both sons were there. William called out from his bedroom "Is that you mum?"

"Yep, give me a minute to put my bags away and I'll come and see you." She could feel her stomach start to churn, knowing that her son would not bolt straight into a conversation about what his father had said; he was far too sensitive, but he would look at her with that knowing smile. She braced herself for the inevitable disclosure.

She walked into her bedroom and immediately sent Kate a text message. 'Wish me luck, I'm about to throw myself to the lions C xx' 'Thinking of U my love. K xx' Feeling somewhat supported, she walked across the hall into William's room; leaning over she kissed him and then sat on the bed.

He looked at her for some moments and then said gently; "Ok Mum, what's going on?"

"What did your father tell you?"

"He said he'd caught you with someone else in your room, that you'd insulted him and sent him away. He implied that I should be very curious to know who your new love interest is."

"Right, well first of all, he didn't catch me because it's no business of his who I am with in my room. Anyway, catching me 'at it' as he crudely put it would imply he somehow thinks I'm doing something wrong, which I'm not. We are divorced so logically I can't be 'caught out'; he's so misguided, so juvenile sometimes."

She sat for a moment making sure she considered her words carefully.

"Yes, it's true I did insult him, after he had cheated his way to my room and insulted the person I was with. He deserved it."

"So, mum who is this mystery person?"

"It's complicated, but I'll try to explain it. I just have to say outright that my new love interest is another woman."

Her son opened his mouth to speak but nothing seemed to come out; he just stared at his mother. Caroline waited, not wanting to jump in until she had some kind of reaction.

"Wow, well I don't know what to say mum. It's a bit of a surprise. Do I know her?"

"Yes, you do. She's a colleague from work. We became friends a few months ago; she found me upset in my office when things were really bad with your father, and she offered me support and friendship. It kind of developed from there. We love each other and it all feels very right and something that we want to keep going with."

"Is it Kate McKenzie?"

"What do you say that?" she asked and then nodded.

"Well, skimming through all the eligible women on staff, she's the only one lovely enough for you!" he paused for a moment. "Does she make you happy mum?"

"Very; she's a lovely gentle woman but protective of me; which is such a change I have to say. We have fun together, she takes me out of my head and helps me live in my feelings and enjoy life. I think you would like her. She's intellectual but not in your face about it like I am."

He smiled at this statement. He was constantly telling his mother to chill out. "I already do like her; remember I'm in the choir; she's very kind and smart mum. If she makes you happy, that's all I care about." he said as he hugged her. Caroline was always amazed at how gentle and sensitive this boy was. His father was not a role model in that respect and she felt she wasn't really, as Kate had told her she spent too much time in her head.

"I'd rather you didn't mention this to anyone at the moment, especially Lawrence. I suspect it will be hard for him and I need to choose the right moment. Do you think your father said anything to him?"

"No, he didn't speak to him and I suggested to dad that it might be a good idea if he kept his opinions to himself for now."

Caroline turned to see Lawrence standing at the door. "What didn't dad tell me?"

"Oh, you're here, how long have you been standing there?"

"Just long enough to know that there's something I don't know!"

"Okay, well, I have started seeing someone and we've been spending time together these last few months. This friend came to Edinburgh to the conference with me and your father happened to be there too. He wasn't happy that I was there with someone else and he was rather rude."

"Seeing who? How come we didn't know; is it the person you've been having coffee with after work?"

"Yes. It's a colleague from school."

"Oh OK well that's nothing; who is it?"

"Kate McKenzie."

"She alright, I have her for French. Why would dad be bothered about that; why be rude?"

"Well the thing is, Kate and I have become more than friends, Lawrence, we love each other and are in a relationship. Your father is upset because he wanted me to go back to him now that his affair is over."

"A relationship; you mean like girlfriends?"

"Yes."

He stood there for a few moments obviously trying to digest what his mother had just told him. "Right;" Leaving her with that comment he turned and walked away.

Caroline sighed and looked at William. "It's OK mum give him time, he'll adjust. It's not cool for him especially you being the Principal and Kate being on staff."

"I know that and I agonised over it the beginning, but I can't throw away this chance at happiness. It says a lot about Kate that no-one at school is aware of our relationship that I know of; have you heard any gossip?"

"No mum."

 **The Issues**

Kate made herself a coffee and curled up on the sofa; she looked wistfully out of the window and thought about how she might broach the topic of a baby with Caroline. Whilst married to Richard, she had several miscarriages and that fact alone, along with the distance that had grown between them brought their marriage to its knees. However in the last twelve months her biological clock had been ticking louder than ever and she had decided to go ahead and try for a child, alone if necessary. She had even contacted an old and very dear friend and discussed it with him. He had been quite receptive to the idea; but no details had been ironed out. Meeting and falling in love with Caroline had strengthened her desire as she dreamed of having this magnificent woman to help her parent a child.

Caroline sat up at her kitchen bench with a glass of wine, she needed a massive hit of Dutch courage for what she was about to do. She had avoided talking to Kate about her mother as she couldn't see any point in discussing her conservative attitudes until it was absolutely necessary, especially given that Kate said her own mother was open-minded. However, now that John and the boys knew about it all, it wouldn't be long before someone either accidentally slipped up or, in the case of John, more likely deliberately let it slip.

Caroline tapped on the window. Celia saw her and opened the door.

"Hello love, when did you get back; how was the conference?"

"Oh it was good mum (if only she knew); I got back about an hour ago. How are you? Alan? Is he here?"

"No love he's gone over to Halifax for the day, another minor crisis I expect. Shall I make you a cup of tea?"

"No thanks mum. I came to tell you something."

"What?"

Caroline sat down in an attempt to look more relaxed. "Well, over the past few months, I've been spending quite a bit of time with a friend of mine from work. You know, I don't often socialise with my staff, I like to keep the lines crisp; anyway Kate, her name is Kate McKenzie, saw one day that I was pretty miserable and she took a risk and asked me if I was OK. It was the first time anyone had noticed and certainly asked me if they could help."

"Well, that's nice. You've certainly been through the mill these past few months thanks to that idiot you married."

"Yes well anyway, our friendship has changed and we have become, you know, more than friends. Kate's my partner now."

Celia looked utterly shocked. Neither spoke for quite a few moments.

"I took her to the conference with me, not knowing John would be there; of course he saw us and made a fuss, became rude and insulting and then phoned William, making insinuations about me."

"Caroline, what are you talking about?"

"I love her mum and she loves me and we want to be together. I hope she'll come and live with me once the boys are comfortable."

"Caroline, we've been through this before, when you were at University. You got over it then, you'll get over it now. It's probably just a reaction to all the upset and loneliness. You can't seriously think that it would be OK; not with two sons and the job you've got."

"Mum, I don't want to get over it. We're happy together, she's lovely, gentle and kind and she's good for me."

"Well why can't you just be friends?"

"I told you, I love her. It's gone way beyond just friendship."

"Well, I'm not going to tell you I approve because I don't. But I suppose if you keep it quiet, no one needs to find out. Just don't flaunt her around here."

"Did you hear what I said? I want to live with her. We want to be together, not sneaking around like two teenagers avoiding their parents. She sat with me as my partner at the conference and the official dinner and no-one batted an eyelid. In fact she's so beautiful that I had to watch I didn't lose her; one professor on our table barely took his eyes off her."

"Well, you'll do what you want no matter what I say; but I'd rather you kept me out of the loop. I don't want it in my face."

"Ok Mum, your call." Caroline left her mother's flat, saddened by what she'd heard but with a sense of relief that at least it was out in the open; she went up to her room and called Kate.

"Hi there beautiful" Kate answered.

"Are you free at the moment Kate, could I come round for an hour?"

"Free as a bird and would love to see you, is something up? You sound a bit frazzled; was it hard telling the boys?"

"I'll tell you when I get there; see you in a bit." With that she hung up.

"Boys, I'm off out for an hour or so. I'll be back for dinner; do you fancy take away?"

"Thai for me mum. Thanks."William called down the stairs. "I'm going to Angus's." Lawrence said as he pushed past her on the stairs.

"Mum, may I go to Angus's?" she called after him.

"Yea; whatever." She decided to let it go for now as he banged out of the house. She rang Angus's mother and told her they'd had a bit of a spat and he was on his way over. His mother laughed and assured Caroline she's take care of him.

Kate opened the door and grabbed Caroline's hand and pulled her inside. She kissed her and then walked ahead of her to the lounge. "Are you Ok? Has something happened? Come on, come and sit down and tell me what's up."

"It's hard Kate. I haven't told you much about my mother, for a very good reason. She's rather conservative and narrow minded; and today because John has stirred the shit I've had to tell the boys and my mother before they heard it from anyone else."

"Sounds like it was hard?"

"Yes it was, particularly Lawrence and then mum."

Kate put her arms around her and pulled her close. Caroline let herself be held and sank into her needing some comfort. They sat there for a while before Kate asked her if she wanted talk about it. "I just need to relax a bit first; safe to say only William was understanding and happy for me."

Kate looked at the time, just after four o'clock. "What time do you have to be back?"

"I said I'd be back for tea with take away. It will only be for William as Lawrence stormed out and went to Angus's."

"That will give us a bit of time, and I can think of a few ways to make you feel better." She kissed Caroline's neck as she said it.; causing her to moan as she did. They lay on the sofa together Caroline feeling the tension leaving her body as Kate massaged her neck and kissed her softly; soon she began to open up about what had just happened at home.

"William was a little stunned just for a moment but when I told him it was you, it made a big difference. He obviously has a lot of respect for you and ultimately he just wants his mum to be happy. He's very sensitive Kate."

"Yes, I've noticed that at school; I think he sometimes has a bit of a hard time with the male rough and tumble. Lawrence I suspect is a different kettle of fish."

"Yes he's that bit more immature and his father's leaving hit him hard." They chatted about the boys and wondered about the best ways to gently lead them to accepting their relationship.

"You know Caroline, there's still an awful lot we don't know about each other isn't there? Everything seems to have happened so quickly; we need to take some time to talk about stuff."

"What stuff? I think I've just about told you everything; I am aware that over the last few months I'm the one who's done most of the talking."

"Yes well exactly, and that's alright, but there are things about me that you don't know yet and they could be important as we get closer."

"Well, tell me something now while we're relaxing."

Kate hadn't expected to have this window of opportunity for some time but seeing that it had presented itself she decided she may as well take the plunge. "You know I told you that I had several miscarriages while I was married?"

"Yes, heartbreaking for both of you; I can't imagine how upsetting it must have been."

"Well, you know I'm thirty nine and my biological clock is ticking?"

"Yep; although you're still young."

"Well not long before we started seeing each other, I decided that I would try, one last time for a baby, even if I had to bring it up alone, not ideal I know but it's such a strong pull in me."

There was a silence between them, Kate knew instantly that Caroline was trying to take in what she had just said and deal with the obvious implications. "Are you telling me that you want a baby, Kate?"

A quiet and hesitant voice said "Yes."

Caroline freed herself from Kate's arms and sat up to face her. It was obvious she was shocked and struggling with a response. "So where does that leave us?"

"What do you mean?"

"Kate I'm in my mid forties and just about to come to the end of my hands on mothering phase; you can't seriously think I would want to start all over again."

Kate's eyes filled with tears. "No, no I suppose it is a bit much to contemplate. I'll understand if you don't want to go there."

Caroline held both of Kate's hands and looked kindly into her eyes; "Within a couple of years, you and I will have the chance to do all the amazing things we want; travel, new jobs, all kinds of possibilities, once Lawrence goes off to University. It'll be great."

Quietly but steadily Kate responded, "I'm not sure you get what I just said Caroline; when I said I'd understand if you didn't want to go there, I meant if you didn't want to continue our relationship if I were to try to become pregnant."

Caroline was stunned. She had no idea Kate was so serious about it. True, she had become very emotional when she told her about the miscarriages and how it had left her with a hole which sometimes made her feel incomplete. However she had no idea that this bombshell would be dropped; it had certainly taken her off guard.

Neither of them spoke for a while. Kate got up and walked over to the window and stood with her back to Caroline who in turn stared ahead thinking of all the implications.

"How, how, would you go about it if you did try?" Caroline asked tentatively.

"I don't think we should discuss that until we are both sure of where we are going. If you feel you can't handle it then I would rather keep the details to myself as obviously it will involve a third party. Maybe we'll just let it lie for a while and talk about it another time when we have had a chance to think it through."

She walked back to the sofa and sat down beside Caroline again, gently easing her back into her arms. An uneasy quiet came over them, both lost in their own thoughts and feelings.

"Caroline, maybe now wasn't the best time to tell you, I'm sorry, you've had a rough afternoon and I've just piled this on top of it."

"It's alright, probably better it comes out sooner rather than later. It's just a huge thing that's all; I'm not saying no; I just can't deal with it right now."

They stayed quiet, sipping their wine and generally just being; hands locked tightly, gently kissing now and then; even such a shock wasn't enough to dissipate their need to be close to one another. Suddenly Caroline's phone rang, it was William. "Hi Mum, do you mind if I take a rain check on the Thai?"

"Sure, why?" "A couple of school mates just rang to see if I wanted to see a film with them. So I'm going to go. Will you be OK mum?"

"Yes of course, I'm at Kate's so I'll have dinner here. See you in a couple of hours." She then rang Lawrence and told him she would pick him up on the way home about eight thirty.

Kate made them both something to eat after which Caroline said she would have to go.

"Well we've been on a roller coaster today haven't we?" she posed to Kate.

"We sure have but you know there's no way we could imagine that it would be plain sailing getting together at our age. We have history and there are issues on both sides that will need sorting out."

"So where do we go from here Kate?"

"Off the top of my head, I'd say we'd better get your family on board or at least comfortable before we move on anything else. I doubt a pregnant girlfriend would help our cause a lot. But we will have to come back to it Caroline, it's not something that's going away."

"Getting my family on board is something I intend to do sooner rather than later. I want to be with you. As you can see, even your surprise can't get rid of me that easily."

They kissed one last time and Caroline drove off. Kate went back inside and had the feeling she was on the edge of something; she just wasn't sure what yet.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three - Getting to know you.**

Kate took extra time to get ready; she really wanted to look her best tonight. She was having dinner with Caroline and the boys at a local restaurant. After discussing the best approach, they had come to a decision that the first meeting should be on neutral ground and low key.

Caroline had assured her that both boys were relaxed about it. William positively looking forward to it; Lawrence open to being civil; however he had stipulated that there were to be no PDAs (public displays of affection); his mother had agreed.

In what she thought might be an ice-breaker, Kate had bought a small gift for them, a book for William and the latest copy of Lawrence's favourite comic, and a six month subscription for the rest of the year.

As she sat in her car outside the restaurant, waiting for them to arrive, she thought long and hard about how she might fit into this family and what the challenges could be. She expected, from what little she knew of him, and what Caroline had said, that she would feel comfortable with William. She hoped Lawrence would eventually grow out of his oppositional demeanour as he matured and got to know her better. The worst case scenario was that they would have to wait the two years before he went off to university. She doubted Caroline would agree to that.

She had pushed the pregnancy issue onto the back-burner, at least for the moment and in the two weeks since she raised it, it had not been spoken about by either of them. However it was constantly on her own mind; the ticking of the clock louder by the day, and loudest when she was close to Caroline.

The familiar car pulled up a few metres away and Kate watched as the three people who could soon constitute her new family, got out. She walked over to them, remembering not to reach out and kiss her beloved Caroline, as she had been forewarned.

Caroline leaned into her slightly, "Hi sweetheart, are you OK?" "Yes, yes I'm fine, a bit nervous."

"Hello Kate", William reached out and shook her hand; "you look very nice tonight."

"Thanks, it's nice to see you outside school." She turned and smiled at the younger son; "Good to see you too Lawrence." He smiled quietly at her and then looked at his mother.

"Come on everyone, let's go inside; I've got a booking." Caroline spoke to the waiter and they were shown to their table. She had deliberately chosen a middle of the road restaurant where she thought the boys would feel more comfortable and Lawrence in particular would find something on the menu he could enjoy.

The conversation centred firstly around what they would all eat and drink. Once the orders had been taken and their drinks had arrived, they settled into conversation about their day. Caroline was always rather circumspect about anything to do with school if the boys were around and so she kept her questions and comments focussed on what they had been doing at school. William talked about his English Literature project and the short story he was writing. Lawrence managed to say a few words about his rugby game, which they had won.

"Kate, do you mind me asking about your family?" William asked gently.

"No not at all. I'm an only child like your mum. My dad is English and my mum American. I have a few more cousins than Caroline but they mostly live in the States, just a couple here in UK. My mum lives in the States too."

"What does she do over there?"

"She's a lecturer at Columbia University." Kate replied rather shyly, not wanting to look as though she was showing off.

"And your father?"

"Oh my dad's in a nursing home, he has dementia; he's quite a bit older then my mother. They divorced just after I finished University." William smiled and nodded. Caroline looked a little uncomfortable as she felt Kate was getting the third degree; she changed the subject to William's application to Oxford and what he would read there.

Their food arrived and there was general chit chat about how it was and what they might have for dessert; other than that it was a little awkward. Kate found herself having to concentrate hard on not gazing at Caroline, it was harder than she expected; however they did manage a few knowing looks.

When they had finished, Kate bent down and lifted up a plastic bag. She fished out two packages and gave them to the boys. "I just wanted to give you both a little something to say thank you for tonight, for coming out with us and giving me a chance to get to know you a bit better." Caroline beamed at her and said; "Kate, you didn't need to do that."

"No I didn't need to but I wanted to."

William opened his parcel and was thrilled with the book she had chosen for him, one of the classics. She had seen him reading a lot at school and over the last week paid attention to what he was reading. Lawrence opened his and she saw a wide grin come across his face; he looked over at Kate; "This is the very latest edition of my favourite comic. I've been hanging out to get it. How did you know?" Kate tapped the side of her nose in a gesture of secrecy. Then an envelope fell out of the pages and he opened it and was shocked to see the subscription. "Wow, thanks very much Ms McK... sorry, Kate. This is great!"

The gesture had been well received, but she was all too aware that bribery didn't last too long and she would need to win their respect and acceptance on her own merits.

As they left the restaurant, Caroline handed the boys the keys and told them to wait for her in the car. Once they were safely out of sight, she pulled Kate close and kissed her.

"Hey you I thought you said no PDAs!"

"Not possible, I can't go home without at least kissing you. Can you try to get to school a bit earlier in the morning and come to my office?"

"Yep. I'll try for eight thirty."

With that they left each other and drove off.

The next morning, as Caroline walked towards her office door, she saw that Kate was already there waiting for her. She closed and locked the office door as they both got inside.

"What's all this about? Kate asked.

"I'm having a hard time being away from you, so little time together, clandestine meetings; it's getting to me Kate."

"Come here." She pulled Caroline into her and kissed her softly. "I don't know what to say, I'm as free as a bird and ready to go where you want to take me. But, it isn't that simple for you and I can't tell you how it's all going to play out can I?"

"Where do you want it to go?"

"I want you, I want to wake up next to you every morning, I want a good relationship with the boys, and...there was some hesitation, I want us to have a child together. That's my dream Caroline, all of it."

 **Are we having a baby?**

They sat opposite each other at Kate's dining room table; finishing the last of the meal she had cooked them. It was Friday night and Caroline had the luxury of a night with Kate. William was well able to be on his own at home and Lawrence was with his father, who had finally settled into a decent flat and was able to have Lawrence to stay comfortably. He had seemed calmer since John got all this sorted and he appeared to enjoy the time with him. Needless to say, this was a bonus for Caroline.

"Do you realise it's almost nine months we've been seeing each other now?' Kate asked.

"Feels a lot longer to me; like it's hard to remember not being with you." Caroline took hold of Kate's hand as she almost whispered this.

"My birthday isn't far away you know, my fortieth. That clock I told you about, the biological one, well I can't ignore it for much longer Caroline. Either you and I or just I, have to make a decision soon."

"I know, I know, it's a hard one for me. On the one hand it wasn't anywhere on my radar, not in a million years, but I can understand your deep longing. Babies, they're fundamental aren't they. I've given it quite a lot of thought Kate and I think you should go ahead and try."

"I'm not quite sure what you're saying Caroline or should I say what you actually mean."

"I'm saying that in principle, I think you should try; I'll support you all the way. If you get pregnant, we'll deal with it then. I don't have a right to stop you and if you wait for me to be sure, then it might be too late. Losing you over it all is not an option that's for sure."

From Kate's perspective, it wasn't an overly positive response, not an enthusiastic one, but it was the assurance that Caroline would support her and stay with her through it all.

"Thank you Caroline; it means the world to me that you at least understand my need to try."

After they had made love that night, Caroline stroked Kate's face and looking intently at her said, "You realise that there will be some aspects of you trying to get pregnant that we'll need to talk through."

"Yes darling I know that."

"Have you actually thought about it? You told me in the beginning that there was someone who was apparently willing to be involved. Will you tell me about that now?"

"Ok. When I was at Durham, I went out with a guy called Greg for a while. However, after a few months we realised that we didn't have the proverbial chemistry; but we had become really good friends by then, and we've stayed friends since. He's the one I asked about helping me and he's open to discussing it."

"Is he married?"

"Not now, he was for few years, he married not long after me and Richard. It didn't last very long and he's been on his own since then."

"Any children?"

"No. I'm not sure of the reasons around that; I've never asked."

"So if he says yes and you or we decide to go ahead, how will we do it?"

"Well there are three ways I suppose, IVF, or we could try the 'turkey baster' trick or I could just sleep with him."

"Sleep with him! I don't think I could handle that Kate. I can't even bear to contemplate it."

"No, I can understand that, it wouldn't be my first choice either, but IVF is costly and complicated. The other well, I've only heard about it, I have no idea how you actually do it."

They both giggled at the thought and prospect of such a task.

"Let's talk about it again in the morning. I think I need to make sure you know who you belong to now." Caroline pulled her close and Kate willingly allowed herself to be possessed.

Over breakfast, they brought up the topic again and taking a big leap of trust, they agreed they would contact Greg and get the ball rolling. Kate was going to ring over the weekend and work out with him what he would be happy with. Caroline felt unexpectedly a little excited by the prospect but she kept it to herself for the moment.

Sunday afternoon, and Caroline was at her desk in her office at home. Her phone rang; "Hi darling, what are you doing?"

"I'm trying to finalise the funding submissions I started last week. What about you?"

"I've just come off the phone with Greg. We had a long chat, I've told him all about you and he's happy for me. He's also willing to help us."

Caroline felt her heart flutter. "Wow that's great, so how do you feel about that?"

"I'm excited Caroline, It's just right and he's a good man, he'll make a great baby!" Caroline could almost hear the wide smile and excitement as she listened.

"So what do we do now?"

"Well first of all I'm going to do some research on how we might go about it and then we'll arrange to all meet and then we'll go ahead if we're all ready."

"Kate, why don't you come over here for a couple of hours; are you busy? I'd like to be with you as you look it all up."

"Are the boys there?"

"Yes, but you know, they'll have to get used to you coming round."

"Okay, I'll be there in about half an hour."

Kate arrived and they sat up at the kitchen bench together having a drink. "Have you done any research already Kate?"

"Yes I've had a quick look and the IVF is like I said, rather an expensive option and I have to go through a lot of medical procedures to extract eggs. Greg would have to be 'on call' as it were. It's not my first choice Caroline." Caroline listened intently and nodded in support.

"With the sperm donation, we can try to insert it ourselves or we can have an obstetrician do it. The last option, I couldn't go through with it Caroline." She put her hand over her lover's. "I couldn't let anyone touch me now."

"Thank God Kate; it would kill me if you chose to do that. I suppose I should be more grown up, but the thought of you with someone else, well, there aren't any words." She leant over the bench and kissed her.

"I feel like a sixteen year old," Caroline started to laugh. "Why?" "Well, I want to shout to the boys; we're just going up to my room to listen to some music, that's what they'd say." Kate threw her head back and laughed.

A couple of weeks later, the two women arrived at the hotel where they'd arranged to have dinner with Greg. They had checked in for two nights to make a weekend of it. If the meeting went well they may ask Greg to give them a donation this weekend. They thought after talking it all through, they may try to do it themselves first. Kate had done the research, and spoken to her local GP to get an understanding of how to do it and how it would work. The GP had been fantastic and given her lots of advice and supplied the equipment they would need. The doctor had stressed two things to Kate; to take a test to see when she was ovulating, and to make love just before the insemination.

Waiting in the bar for Greg, Caroline asked Kate to tell her more about him.

"He's a bit zany Caroline, talks quite a bit but he really is a kind and decent man. He's been such a good friend to me; he offered me a lot of support when I split up with Richard."

As they sipped their drinks in the bar, Greg was checking in. He'd decided to stay there at least that night. He'd thought through what he was about to do and decided to go ahead; he couldn't see any point in delaying, if they were ready.

"Greg!" Kate called as she saw him coming into the bar. She got up and walked over to him and they hugged for some time. Caroline looked long and hard at him, trying to weigh him up but also she couldn't shake the imaginary vision of him with Kate; it disturbed her more than she cared to think.

"Caroline, this is Greg." "Hi Caroline, good to meet you, hey this is all very exciting isn't it?" He gushed.

"Er, yes, pleased to meet you too."

The three of them spent three hours over dinner, getting to know each other and discussing the matter of the donation. Greg seemed to talk endlessly which began to wear Caroline out after a while; but she knew that the two friends had a lot to catch up on and after all he was about to do something very special for Kate, no, for both of them. Kate had been very clear about the fact that this baby would be hers and Caroline would be the other parent, if their relationship became permanent, which from her perspective, it would be. Greg said he fully understood and would make no parental claims. However he did ask that they keep him in the loop about the birth and progress as it grew up; all of which was left open for negotiation.

"Well then, when would you like to do it?" He asked rather matter of fact way. "It could be tonight, or I could stay another day if you prefer to wait until tomorrow. I'm just going to nip to the bathroom." With that he left them alone.

"Caroline what do you think?"

"To be honest Kate, I would really like you to myself for the rest of the weekend and we can hardly exclude him if he's here. Are you ready to try tonight?"

She put her hand over Caroline's and looked straight into her eyes, those beautiful crystal blue eyes, "I'm more than ready my darling."

When Greg came back they told him that they were ready tonight and that they would indeed like the rest of the weekend to themselves; this was a very intimate occasion for them. He understood completely. They agreed, he would bring his gift to their bedroom in about half an hour.

Caroline's heart was pumping as she stood under the shower; she could feel a heavy sense of responsibility flooding over her. God, she thought, I've got to get this right. They had been over the technique several times and Kate tried hard to assure her that there was nothing to worry about, she would be fine. Kate joined her and they stood together letting the water flow over them, the sexual tension growing by the second.

There was a discrete knock at the door and Greg stood there with a small paper bag in his hands. Kate invited him in; both women were in their bathrobes. No-one spoke, he simply leaned forward and kissed them both on the forehead and then turned and left. Kate couldn't help but notice a slight twitch of sadness in his eyes. She understood completely, this was the potential child he'd never had.

They climbed in to bed together and began to make love; the depth of feeling was like nothing Caroline had ever felt, bar the birth of her children. Kate was praying that the love she felt for Caroline would be enough to ignite a spark of life within her. As Kate reached her climax she felt a gentle pressure and as she cried out Caroline's name, the warm fluid entered her body and she opened herself completely to a whole new life


	4. Chapter 4

**In the Beginning – Chapter Four**

 **The morning after**

Caroline woke as the morning light streamed into their hotel room. Kate's head was resting against her neck and her arms and legs were firmly wrapped around her; she was in a deep sleep. The remnants of last night's extraordinary love making were still visible on Caroline's beside table. She looked at them and was filled with memories of the amazing night they had experienced; this beautiful woman in her arms, had trusted her to try to create a new life, a baby that would be the product of their love and commitment. In so far as she was unable to supply the genetics for this hoped for child, she could rest now knowing that, if Kate did indeed get pregnant, it was something they had created together. She had no regrets.

Kate stirred and blinked her eyes open looking up at Caroline as she did. "You're awake."

"Yes my love; I've been lying here re-living last night. God Kate, it was so powerful, in my wildest dreams, I couldn't have foreseen how much it would take me over."

"It was perfect; you were perfect, and if I'm blessed enough to get pregnant, there'll be no doubt that it will be ours. 'Thank you' doesn't even come close for what you gave me, and the sensitive and beautiful way you made it all happen."

"Now we wait; but the great thing is we are waiting together; I'll be there every day with you Kate. If you'd asked me two or three months ago, I couldn't have imagined how much I want to be a part of it."

After having breakfast with Greg before he left, they spent the rest of the weekend relaxing, walking, having leisurely meals and talking about how they would go forward when they went home.

 **Caroline**

Caroline was sitting up at the kitchen bench with the boys; she'd asked them to come and have a drink and a little chat with her. The two women had come up with the plan that from now on, she and Kate would spend from Friday evening to Monday morning together; one weekend at her place and the other at Kate's.

"I can't play games anymore boys; this arrangement will suit us for the time being, but it's the minimum. Out of respect for you two we are holding off moving in together. The weekend I go to Kate's will be just for the two of us. William, you are old enough to be here alone or you can go to Dad's with Lawrence. The other weekend when we are here, we are both happy for you to be at home; in fact we'd really like it."

"Mum, that's absolutely fine, you know I wouldn't mind if Kate did move in but that's your call."

"What about you Lawrence?" his mother asked.

"Well I don't really have a choice. I don't know how I feel yet Ma, but I'll go along with it." She thanked him and felt some relief that there was a slight chink in his armour.

A few moments later, Celia appeared at the kitchen door. Caroline looked up and saw her. "Let Granny in." she said in general to whichever boy was listening

William got up and opened the door, as she walked in, both boys picked up their drinks and walked off down the hallway to the lounge.

"Hello, did you have a nice weekend away?" she asked her daughter.

"Yes mum it was lovely."

"Did just the two of you go?"

"Mm, but we did have an evening with one of Kate's old friends; it was good for Kate to catch up with him."

"Him, so it was a bloke? Who is he?"

"His name's Greg and they were at Durham University together. They went out for a while and they've been good friends ever since."

"Oh so she's another that bats for both teams!"

"Mum, please there's no need to start all that again. It's just is what it is; I've told you, you can either accept it or not; I can't really let it bother me. We love each other and we make each other happy; that's it and I'm not going to let anyone spoil that."

"Ok. Well you know where I stand."

"Yes but you need to know now, that at least every other weekend, Kate will be here, and the other weekend I'll be at her place. I'd like to you to feel free to come in when she's here but that will be on the understanding that you'll be respectful of her and our relationship."

"You mean she'll be staying here overnight for the weekend?"

"Yes mum, staying overnight and sleeping with me."

"What about the boys, under the same roof while you two are canoodling in your bedroom. It isn't right Caroline, it's too 'in your face' for all of us."

"Mum look at me? How do I look to you?"

"In what way, what do you mean?"

"Well do I look sad and miserable like I did twelve months ago? Do I have a twinkle in my eyes? Do they light up when I mention Kate? Be honest."

"Well, you certainly look better than you did when John first left but I put that down to you getting over it."

"That's true, but I've been able to get through it as I have, because of Kate."

Celia sighed and made no more comment. Caroline felt solid and strong as if nothing could overcome the glow that she carried inside her in her waking and sleeping moments. She had never felt happier, never more complete.

 **Kate**

Kate flicked through her diary on the kitchen bench. She turned the pages to a fortnight ahead and there in bold red ink was the letter P. Her periods had always been regular to within a day and so this square with the P on it represented one of the most important dates in her life. The day she'd get an idea whether her beautiful, loving Caroline had indeed made her pregnant. While she felt the deepest gratitude when she thought of Greg and the gift he had so generously given them, there would be no doubt in her mind how she had conceived.

She toyed with the idea of speaking to her mother and telling her all about it but then she thought better of it. Ginika had suffered a lot each time Kate had miscarried in the past and it would be cruel to build up her hopes again, only to have them dashed. As an only child she knew that she was the only hope of grandchildren and sometimes it weighed heavily on her although her mother never spoke of it like that.

She picked up her phone and rang Caroline. "Hi there you, what are you up to?"

"Oh I've just spoken to the boys and my mother about our new living arrangements; so now they know. The boys are fine, William said he wouldn't mind if you moved in permanently. Lawrence said he was OK with the weekend arrangements and I suspect he just needs time to get used to it. My mother still isn't coming to the party but I'm not going to let that bother me darling."

"Well done, I'm proud of you. Can't wait for Friday when we drive home to my place together. Caroline I just wanted to tell you that the 14th is D day for us. That's when my next period is due."

"What day is that?"

"Saturday."

"So, according to my calculations you and I should be at your place for the weekend?"

"Yep. I don't know how I'm going to wait; I'm a bag of excitement already! I feel different, I'm so hopeful Caroline, I love you so much; that has to count for something."

 **Moving On and In**

Friday came around and Caroline arrived at the cottage a few minutes after Kate, who came out to meet her and watched as she went to the boot of her car and lifted a very large suitcase out. "What on earth is this?" Kate asked as she helped her to lug it into the house and upstairs.

"This is half of my cosmetics, toiletries, weekend clothes and two work outfits; laptop and spare chargers etc."

"Why are you bringing all this for a weekend?"

"It isn't for a weekend Kate, it's for my second home. I couldn't bear the thought of an overnight bag every time I'm here for the weekend. I want to think I live here; leave work on Friday and come home; I can go upstairs to get changed and my stuff's in the wardrobe and bathroom."

Kate put her arms around her and pulled her in for a kiss. "Wherever we are together is home Caroline and this is a fabulous idea. I'll do the same at your place."

After unpacking, Caroline came downstairs; "I'm starving, I didn't get lunch today;"opening the fridge, taking out some pate and a bottle of wine; going next to the cupboard and getting biscuits, chatting away about her day at work. Kate stood back and watched; it was heart warming to see how much Caroline was indeed 'at home'.

Once settled with their wine and nibbles, Kate said, "Caroline we're having a visitor tomorrow evening, for dinner and to stay the night."

"Tomorrow! Who?"

"Remember me telling you about my friend Anna; the one who lectures in America?"

"Yes vaguely"

"Well she's in York for a week to see her grandparents and she called yesterday to see if we could catch up, so I invited her for dinner tomorrow night and suggested she stay as she likes a drink or two. I'm excited; I haven't seen her for two years."

"Oh right, well OK then, I guess it's settled." There was a tone of mild irritation coupled with disappointment in her voice.

"You don't seem happy."

"Well I thought, you know, our first weekend together with the new arrangement and all; I suppose I want you to myself."

Kate leaned over and kissed her gently. "I know, but we can't live in a bubble my love, what would you have wanted me to say to her?"

"No, no I'm being silly. Remind me again about her."

"We were at Durham together and we flatted for a couple of years. She went to London from University and has had an amazing career. Then five years ago she got a job lecturing at a University in one of the southern states of America. Two years ago, much to everyone's amazement, she met and married Leroy, a local guy. She's a funny lady Caroline, wicked sense of humour."

This spontaneous gesture was not something Caroline had a lot of experience with. She couldn't even pin point another woman who was a friend like that, she certainly didn't have any 'Greg' in her life. It reminded her of the times she'd wished in the past that she did have another someone, outside the family, in whom she could confide and trust; that is until Kate, her darling Kate.

In bed that night, she said; "Sometimes when I listen to you and watch you I feel like an emotional cripple Kate. I was a good wife, in so far as I could be and I certainly love my children to bits and my mother, but outside of that I'm not good at picking up cues from people. I spent my time at Oxford focussed on study; I did have a social life but nothing like you describe,"

"We're all different darling. I had much more affection and parents who, while I was growing up at least, were loving and affectionate to each other. It's not your fault that yours weren't. You're more of an introvert than me, but believe me you are very good at picking up my cues."

Kate kissed her neck and Caroline had no difficulty reading the message.

Saturday they did shopping and tidying the house in preparation for their visitor. What they couldn't know is that while at the supermarket, they had been spotted by Caroline's secretary Beverley, who knew her boss so well that she had no difficulty reading the looks that flew between the two of them. Out of respect for Caroline's privacy, she didn't approach them. However she did smile widely to herself, happy to see the suspicions she'd had for some time, were confirmed.

Anna arrived like a whirlwind, at around five o'clock. Lots of hugs and kisses for Kate and offered to Caroline, who cautiously kissed her on the cheek. She was shown to the spare room to dump her stuff. Kate's bedroom door was open and she took a sneak peek inside noticing both bedside tables were in use; she was glad.

As they sat having a drink, Anna said to Kate," God you look good, positively blooming," and looking at Caroline with a twinkle in her eye, "I suppose that's down to you?"

Caroline blushed. "I'd like to think so."

"I told Leroy all about you two."

Kate asked her what he'd said.

"Oh he put on his best southern drawl and said, 'well as my old granddaddy would say, they'll have to stand before the almighty on judgement day."

Caroline's face was a picture, she was outraged by the comment and was just about to open her mouth when Kate stepped in. "And what did you say?"

"Yes they sure will honey, right behind the Klu Klux Klan." Caroline's mouth opened even wider.

Kate threw her head back laughing. "Caroline she's joking darling; I told you she has a wicked sense of humour."

Caroline recoiled and felt a bit stupid; another missed cue.

"No Kate, he's delighted and looking forward to meeting you both, one day."

After dinner and a few wines, Anna became a little more serious and told them about meeting Leroy and how she couldn't have imagined wanting to get married up until that time, but he had swept her off her feet. They were very happy together.

"Now comes the hard bit of trying to get pregnant Kate. At forty, I'm not overly optimistic; we've been trying since we got married but nothing doing so far. When I get back, we're going to have to look at IVF."

"Well, don't give up my friend. It's not impossible at our age, harder yes but not impossible."

"Well at least you know you're bits are working, after all you have managed to get pregnant in the past; despite all the heartache my love." Anna had been wonderful when Kate had lost her babies and had rushed to be with her and support her.

Caroline was taken-a-back by the overt way she referred to Kate's miscarriages.

"What about you Kate? Are you going to try again?"

Kate flashed a look at Caroline to gauge how she might answer; she needn't have bothered, Caroline emboldened by the banter between the two of them said, "Yes we're already trying, hoping we can have a family. I have two sons as you know but I would like us to have a child too."

Kate was flooded with emotion; her eyes filled with tears as she listened to Caroline.

"Wow that's great. Do you mind me asking how you are trying?"

Kate took over. "We've used a sperm donor."

"At a clinic?"

"No ourselves."

"Oh so you must know the donor then?"

"Yes it's a close friend; he's happy to help and will not expect any parental rights."

"Kate, is it Greg? It's the kind of thing he'd do, especially for you."

"Yes, yes it is. But we're not telling people Anna. That's for Greg to tell if he wants to, which actually I doubt he would."

"Of course, sorry. I won't say anything you know that."

After chatting a bit more and a last coffee, they all decided to hit the sack. As they lay in bed, Caroline said to Kate, "listen, can you hear Anna next door? She seems to be talking quite loud and making some well, funny moans."

"Caroline, for goodness sake; get with it. She's talking to Leroy, they been apart for two weeks already, what do you think they're talking about at this time of night, in bed?"

"Oh God, yes of course, sorry it never occurred to me." she laughed and shook her head at herself.

"It isn't like you and I haven't loved each other over the phone my darling!" Kate laughed.

"Kate?"

"Mm?"

"If we can hear her, it stands to reason she would hear us?"

"She's too busy, now come here and stop worrying."

 **P Day**

Kate woke up and rolled over to see Caroline still asleep. She had been tossing and turning all night trying to work out if her body felt different; did she have cramps, was she feeling bloated and emotional? Somehow she had convinced herself that she didn't in fact feel any of those things. Yesterday was the day her period should have started but it hadn't; however she had to give herself a few more days before she could start to think it might have happened. She reached out and picked up the novel she was reading; she didn't want to wake her sleeping beauty just now. Since they had started living together at weekends, Caroline had been sleeping much better, eating better and had a lot more energy.

When she did wake up, Caroline looked at Kate, "Anything?" "No darling."

"Oh God Kate, is it too early to start to hope?"

"Well, technically no, but with my history we'll have to stay cautious for the first trimester Caroline. I don't want us to get our hopes too high or tell anyone until we've had our twelve week scan."

"Yes, of course." Inside she was bubbling with the possibility that she was going to be a mum again; and with her darling Kate.

The week at school was looking hectic for Caroline. She had many meetings and then a Board Inspection looming for the end of the week. Beverley was buzzing in and out of her office as she helped Caroline to prepare everything.

"Well I think that's it for this lot. Would you like a cup of tea, Caroline?"

"Yes please Beverley, why don't you get yourself one too and come and have it with me.?"

Beverley came back ten minutes later with two steaming cups of tea and plonked herself down in front of the Principal.

"Can I ask something personal Caroline?"

"Yep, doesn't mean I'll answer you though." she grinned; she trusted Beverley implicitly.

"Are you in a relationship with Kate?"

Caroline gulped, nearly spitting out her tea.

"What, what makes you think that?"

"Well a few things. Firstly, you are happier in the last six months than I've ever seen you and secondly she seems to need to see you in your office a bit more than most staff members; and I saw the two of you at the Supermarket a couple of Saturdays ago and I know two people in love when I see them."

"I suppose there's no point in denying it then is there?" Caroline laughed. "Yes we are; we've been seeing each other for over a year now and we spend every weekend together, one at mine and one at Kate's. Has anyone else said anything to you?"

"God no! Even if they thought it, they'd know better than to ask me or say anything, you know that."

Caroline smiled lovingly at her. She was a great secretary but also a good friend in a discrete kind of way. She knew this information would be respected and safe with Beverley. "I love Kate very much and she loves me and this is it for both of us. We are just trying to work out the right timing for the boys and I guess my job, before we move in together permanently."

The weekend couldn't come fast enough. Caroline was exhausted from everything going on at work and Kate was emotionally exhausted from the wait. So far so good.

They arrived home to find the boys there. "Hi kids," Caroline shouted."

They responded and then came out to say hello to her and Kate. "So, you're not going to Dad's then?"

"No we're both staying home Mum, is that OK with you two?"

"William, this is your home of course it's OK; Kate and I are glad you are staying, it'll be good to have some time with you." The boys had chosen, for different reasons, to be with John the first weekend Caroline and Kate were at home.

They had dinner together, and much to Kate's delight, the conversation flowed well and she was included in everything. Lawrence thanked her again for the comic subscription and said he'd just received the next one.

All the washing up done, the boys went off to their rooms and the women to the lounge with a glass of wine for Caroline and, just as a precaution, a mineral water for Kate.

"Did you buy it darling?" Caroline whispered tenderly.

"Yes, I've got it upstairs."

"So when will we do it?"

"Tomorrow when we wake up."


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N** _This story is my backfill to Kate and Caroline's relationship, as Caroline said "I'm just trying to explain how it started". Obviously there are elements of this story that lead into some of my others; so it actually isn't intended to stand on its own._

 **In the beginning – Chapter Five**

 **Keeping things quiet**

Both women stood looking at the white stick with two very clear red lines showing across the window in the middle. Neither spoke for a few moments; they simply absorbed what they were seeing. Caroline looked at Kate's face and noticed a tear rolling down her cheek.

She whispered gently, "We've done it, you're pregnant Kate." Kate smiled and nodded; she was overcome with emotion. Caroline held her and kissed her gently, "We're going to be alright; this was meant to be, nothing will go wrong."

They climbed back in bed together to savour the moment and let it all sink in; holding on tightly, overwhelmed, but feeling strong and happy. "Kate, you know that this baby kind of seals our future don't you?"

Kate smiled and kissed her. "Yes I know."

"Three weeks today my darling; so far so good; are you feeling OK?"

"Yes, I think so, I'm a bit tired but I always felt that before. Now I'll just wait for the morning sickness to kick in; I didn't usually have to wait long but it didn't last more than three or four weeks."

Caroline instantly began to feel incredibly protective; she more than Kate, was dreading anything going wrong. She would never say that to her because she knew Kate would be anxious too and she needed to be outwardly strong and encouraging. She almost wished she could flip the calendar on two months so that they could have their first scan and be over the worst of it. When they went out shopping at weekends, Caroline was dying to go to the baby shops and start looking at stuff they would need to buy; again she just had to be patient; she would never forgive herself if she pre-empted things and then it all went wrong.

Their weekend arrangements were getting easier and Kate was feeling more comfortable at Conway Drive. She had ceased to be a peculiarity for Lawrence; he just accepted that she was around and seemed comfortable. William loved her being there. He enjoyed singing, hence he was in two choirs at school; this however was difficult and led to some name calling by the more overtly 'masculine' boys in his year. So it was nothing to hear him and Kate at the piano singing together for an hour at home. There was an affectionate bond developing between them. His mother loved to listen; it often gave her goose bumps.

Celia would usually pop in one of the mornings for a cuppa with them. She tolerated Kate and wouldn't dare be rude to her as she knew well that the fallout would not be pretty; she tended to direct most of her conversation to Caroline and managed to be rude by omission. However she couldn't deny that Caroline looked happy and content and was obviously in love. That being said, she couldn't bear to think of them together; it turned her stomach. Alan on the other hand, was kind and welcoming and freely chatted with Kate when he was around. One weekend they had come over for dinner and Caroline realised quickly that it had been a mistake. Celia managed to shoot her little barbs at every opportunity. She had not invited them again.

This weekend Kate was at Conway drive. She had begun to feel queasy during the week and the morning sickness was increasing. Caroline was getting concerned and wished so much that they were living together all the time. She had made toast and tea and the two of them were sitting up at the kitchen bench; Kate was eating slowly hoping to keep some of it down. Celia appeared at the kitchen window and they both groaned as they enjoyed their quiet mornings together; both boys were late risers at weekends. Caroline let her in and she poured herself a cup of tea and sat up with them. She had come to tell Caroline that she and Alan were going to the farm for a few days. Half way through the conversation, Kate excused herself went upstairs.

There was a slight lull in the conversation, which was already a little strained. William suddenly came to the door and looked at Caroline; "Mum, is Kate alright?"

"Yes, I think so why?"

"I can hear her in your bathroom throwing up. I heard her yesterday too."

Caroline could feel the heat rising in her cheeks and neck and she made sure she didn't look at her mother. "Oh she thinks she must have eaten something that disagreed with her, she's been a bit nauseous the last couple of days. It could be a virus." Caroline turned to William; "It's alright, don't worry about her, I'll go up in a minute and see if she wants anything." William nodded and then went back to his room.

Celia stared at Caroline in an attempt to get her to face her. "Look at me Caroline."

"What Mum?"

"Is she pregnant?"

"Why would you ask that?"

"Well, I'm not daft. I haven't seen her have a wine when you do and she's vomiting after breakfast, they are signs of pregnancy you know."

"Well they might be, but I couldn't comment on that. As far as I know she's just feeling a little nauseous." This was true, she was, but Caroline was not about to discuss why, with her Mother; it was far too soon, even Kate's own mother didn't know yet.

"Why are you trying to avoid the issue Caroline?"

"There is no issue Mum; even if Kate were pregnant, it's not something that you and I would discuss now; people tell others when they're ready. You shouldn't even be asking me."

"Well if she is, it's going to have an impact on you isn't it. You wouldn't want to get caught up in something like that, not at your age. You'd have to agree too that it means she's been with someone else, while she's mucking around with you."

"Stop it Mum! You don't know what you're talking about. Now can we just leave it?" With that she got up from the table and told Celia she was going upstairs to look after Kate.

 **Time for Talk**

Caroline and Kate sat nervously in the waiting room at the hospital. It was the day of their first scan. They had become increasingly optimistic as the weeks had gone by and here they were at 12 weeks; further than Kate had ever gone before. Both her tiredness and nausea had abated somewhat now and Celia had never mentioned it again. Kate was desperate to tell her own mother and they had made a pact that indeed Ginika would be the first to know after them.

"Kate McKenzie?" the call rang out and they jumped up immediately. They followed the radiographer into a small room where Kate lay down and exposed her stomach.

"Kate, I'm Kylie, is this your first pregnancy?"

"No, I've had a few miscarriages but this is the first time I've safely reached 12 weeks."

"I'm sorry to hear of your previous experiences but happy for you that you've come this far, it's a good sign."

She turned to look at Caroline, who was holding Kate's hand. "Are you a relative or friend?"

"I'm Kate's partner."

"Oh, that's lovely; good you are able to be here too then." Caroline smiled, she was slowly coming to the realisation that peoples' reaction to their relationship was not the Armageddon that her mother had always insisted it would be.

Kate felt the cool gel on her stomach and then the familiar circling of the ultra-sound. Soon they could both hear a strong heart beat and Kate beamed from ear to ear. Caroline's hand tightened around hers. However, the radiographer paused and looked a little concerned. "Everything seems good here Kate but I'm just going to fetch a colleague." With that she left the room.

"Caroline, I'm scared."

"It's Ok sweetheart, she's told you everything looks good. Just hold on."

The colleague she returned with came over to the machine and as she sat in front of it Kylie pointed to a couple of things on the screen. They both listened again and seemed to nod in some sort of agreement. She then left the room, smiling at Kate as she did.

"Well, it seems you are having one each ladies!" What she said didn't register with either of them for a few moments. It was Caroline who spoke first. "Are you saying that Kate is having twins?"

"Yes, my colleague and I are quite sure; congratulations. Both babies are looking and sounding very good and strong. We'll show the scans to your obstetrician as they usually like to know very early on and also, if you don't mind me saying, because you are an older first time mum."

There was silence; Kylie asked them to meet her at the desk later and left them to clean up and absorb what she had just told them.

"Oh my God Caroline, I can't believe it; two babies all at once; how are we going to manage?"

Caroline smiled and put her arms around her. "We'll just have to. Two babies, two of us. We'll be OK darling, the main thing is to keep you healthy and look after them." She gently stroked Kate's tummy as she said this; such an intimate and supportive gesture

When they got home Kate immediately went to her laptop to try and contact her mother. Caroline heard Ginika answer and the excitement that followed was lovely to listen to.

"Caroline, can you come here, mum wants to speak to you."

"Hey Caroline; what exciting news! How are you feeling?"

"I'm thrilled to bits Ginika, so happy for all of us; you must be over the moon."

"I am. Now listen, you look after my little girl won't you? I know how much you two love each other and it makes me very happy to know that Kate won't be doing this on her own."

"Don't you worry, I will, I promise."

Caroline then left the two of them to chat and she wandered into the sitting room and stood by the window, looking out on Kate's small but lovely garden. She thought of what Ginika had just said to her; the total acceptance of their love; the expectation that she would be the babies other parent; the responsibility and trust she placed in Caroline. Then she thought of her own mother and how she was going to break it to her, not knowing what she was going to say or do, but fairly sure it wouldn't be supportive. She felt a moment of deep sadness.

When Kate came back into the room, Caroline pulled her close," God, I love you. This is so amazing, I can't believe I ever thought I might not want to be part of it; I couldn't be more excited."

A gentle and loving voice said in return. "I love you too, more than I can tell you and the thought of having a family with you is everything now."

"I've got an idea Kate, let's go into Harrogate, have a lovely lunch somewhere and then go and look at baby things?" This is what they decided to do. They had a wonderful afternoon and for Kate is was a dream come true. She'd never even got to the point of considering this before.

The next weekend, Kate was at Conway Drive. They had decided to tell Celia separately from the boys. Caroline didn't want any of Celia's negativity to influence them. They waited for dinner on Friday night and as they were finishing, Caroline took a deep breath and launched in. "Boys, Kate and I have some news for you. Kate is fourteen weeks pregnant with twins and all is going well."

William smiled immediately,"So granny was right; you know all the puking I heard?"

Both women smiled coyly and nodded. "That's great news I'm so pleased for you, Kate especially."

Lawrence was much quieter. "Well I suppose there's no hiding your relationship now is there? Everyone will know soon."

"Yes Lawrence, they will and I know it might take a while for you to deal with that. Kate and I understand that it's difficult. This is something Kate has wanted for a long time, before she met me, and now it's happened and it's wonderful. I'm sure you'll get used to it."

"Well congratulations Kate."

"Thanks Lawrence. I do know how you feel and I'm already very grateful that you've made my weekends here comfortable." He smiled then asked if he could leave the table. Caroline knew her son enough to recognise the upset in his voice. After a few moments she followed him upstairs.

"Lawrence, can I come in?" he didn't answer so she walked over and sat on the edge of his bed. She could hear the muffled tears coming from the pillow his face was buried in. She sat on the end of the bed and stroked his leg.

He sat up and folded himself around her. "I don't want people to say mean and horrible things about you mum. They'll find out at school and start talking. I don't really care what they say to me but they'd better not start hurting you."

"Lawrence, thank you darling, I love you; you know that, and I promise you I won't let anyone hurt me, you, William or Kate." She cradled him until he calmed down a bit and then left him to have some time on his own. When she got back to the dining room, William and Kate were deep in discussion about it all. She looked at her older son and said, "Go and check on your brother in a few minutes. Have a word with him please."

"Sure mum."

As they sat together on the sofa cuddled up letting the last hour sink in, Caroline decided to bring up something that had been on her mind since they got the news. "Kate, I really think we should move in together now. This arrangement has worked well so far, but I know I'm going to be fretting on the days you aren't with me. I promised your mum I'd take care of you and that's what I want to do, full time."

"I'd like that Caroline, but we have to work out the logistics of it all. We can't all fit in my place but is it the right time for me to move in here? What with Lawrence and your mother?"

"Well, they are going to have to get used to it sooner or later and sooner is what we both want. We'll talk to mum tomorrow. You know, from a selfish point of view, I want you to be here when they kick for the first time. I want to be close as they grow. I want to help you up the stairs when they get heavy!"

Their night was filled with love; gentle, re-assuring but passionate as together and separately they realised just how wonderful this whole life change was; having each other and wanting it to be forever and then the joy of having a family; it all came tumbling out as they let go.

Caroline nibbled her lover's ear and whispered, "You do realise Kate that in a few short months we'll be mums to four kids. Imagine how many grandchildren that could translate into."

"Steady on you" Kate laughed. "Just getting used to the idea of two is about all I can manage at the moment."

The next morning after breakfast, it was time to face Celia. They had decided that they would do it together, but Caroline would field most of the questions. Celia and Alan were coming round for a cuppa when both boys would be out. Kate felt steady and protected; Caroline on the other hand could feel the nerves settling in.

Alan and Celia walked in and Kate brought them through to the dining room table which they had set up for morning tea. Alan smiled and nodded at the table, "This looks smashing." Celia on the other hand was less enthusiastic, "This looks a bit formal, what's it all in aid of?"

After Caroline had made the coffee and everyone had a piece of cake she looked at her mother and said, "Kate and I have some news for you; we are pregnant and having twins. Kate is fourteen weeks. We've had our first scan and everything looks great."

Alan beamed and got up to hug and congratulate them both. Celia on the other hand sat with her mouth hanging open, but nothing coming out; for a few seconds that is.

"We're pregnant! What's that supposed to mean?" Celia eventually spat out.

"What I said mum; Kate is pregnant with twins and they are our babies."

"How can they be your babies, it's not possible."

"Well it is and they are, and how we achieved that is not really anything you need to know mum. Except to correct one misconception, Kate has never been unfaithful to me."

"Caroline you're nearly forty six, the boys will be off to university both of them, in the next couple of years; you can't possibly want to start all over again."

"I can and I do. We're both thrilled."

"Well what does your mother make of all this Kate?"

"Oh gosh Celia, my mum is over the moon as you would imagine. Her first grandchildren, something she may have given up hope of having. She's also very content knowing that Caroline is with me and we'll bring them up together."

"I'll bet she is; let's her off the hook."

"Celia, that's enough!" Alan scolded her. "Can't you even congratulate the lass? Even if it had nothing to do with Caroline, we should be happy for our Kate here."

Tears welled up in Caroline's eyes. Kate noticed it and moved to put her arm around her. "It's alright darling; don't get upset, it's just been a shock for your mother."

"How can you be so understanding, after what she's just said to you?" Caroline mumbled through her tears.

"Because she's had a shock and I'm sure she won't think this way when she's had chance to get used to it. We're ok Caroline, there's nothing to worry about." With that she looked directly at Celia as if willing her to agree and make her daughter feel better. Instead she just got silence.

"Mum, I think you'd better go. I can't cope with this at the moment; Kate is my first priority and I can't listen to you say the things you are, it's too hurtful."

"Do the boys know? What do they think?

"Yes they know. William is delighted, he's very fond of Kate and Lawrence is upset, mostly because he doesn't want me to get hurt by things people might say to me or about me. I don't expect he thought his Granny would be the first."

Celia nodded her head at Alan and beckoned towards the door. He smiled at both of them and then left the house behind her.

"Caroline. I can't move in until Lawrence is better and your mother's hostility has died down. It would upset me too much and take the joy out of my pregnancy. I'm sorry."

"I know; I'm sorry. It just isn't fair." Caroline began to feel hopeless.


	6. Chapter 6

**In the beginning –Chapter Six**

 **Decisions, Decisions**

"Kate, I really can't have this."

"I know, but you can see where I'm coming from can't you? I've waited so long to have a child Caroline; it should be the happiest time of my and our life, but with your mother's attitude, it makes being here very difficult or at least it would be if I lived here."

"Well I can assure you that I'm not going to let my mother ruin everything for us. I want to be with you all the time and I should be able to. I'm going to work on a little idea I have for both her and Lawrence; to make them understand that I mean business. I promised you and your mother that I would take care of you and nothing and no-one is going to stop me from doing that." She leaned across the bed and took Kate's glasses off her nose and the book out of her hands. "Now come here, four nights away from you, is enough to send me crazy. I'm not letting them distract me from what we came to bed early for."

"What's this little idea you're talking about?"

"Not now my darling" smothering her mouth with kisses.

The next weekend, they decided not to go to Conway Drive, but to stay at Kate's. They asked Lawrence if he would like to come too and to their surprise he said yes. "Mum, could I ask Angus to come for the weekend with me?"

"Angus? But how would that work Lawrence? He'd know about Kate then, you know school and all that."

"Mum, he already knows; he's my best friend; I had to tell somebody."

"Well, what did he say?"

"He's cool; told me I was a knob for being horrible."

"So what did you say to that?"

"It's not your mum, penis head."

With that he shrugged and asked would it be OK to which Caroline smiled and said it would; shaking her head as he walked away. Kate just laughed when she told her and suggested they go out and buy a blow up mattress.

Before the weekend arrived, Caroline decided to activate the first part of her plan. She called around to her mother's flat and knocked on the window. Celia and Alan were just finishing their evening meal. Things had been strained since their encounter but they were still speaking when necessary.

"Sit down love." Alan said as he pulled up an extra chair. Caroline nodded her thanks at him.

"Mum, I've come to tell you both something."

"What now, is it triplets?"

"Ok mum, that just makes it easier to tell you. Firstly Kate and I will not be staying here at weekends anymore; I'll go there and before you ask, the boys will come too if they want to. In fact Lawrence and Angus will be there this coming weekend."

"Angus! Well that's the end of your career, as soon as he starts talking about you at school."

Caroline looked at her mother and decided not to respond to that comment. She could see the look of frustration on Alan's face. Poor man she thought; stuck in the middle.

"Well, as I was saying, I have some news. I'm thinking of applying for a job in New York. There's a position coming available at Columbia where Ginika lectures and I'm seriously considering applying. It will give us time to get set up over there before the babies come. We'll have Kate's mum and also a couple of her aunties who would be willing to help us with the babies; in fact they'd be delighted."

"America? That's ridiculous Caroline. What about the boys and the house and your job over here?"

"Mum, the boys will be fine. William will be at University anyway, and he'll come to New York in his breaks. Lawrence will be given the choice of coming with us or staying here with his father. Kate and I will both rent our houses out while we decide what to do in the long term. As to my job, well it isn't important when compared to Kate and the babies."

"Rent the house out? What about me and Alan?"

"What about you? You can still stay here; I'll just rent our part out.

I've got to go now; I've got to get dinner started." And she turned and left.

Celia was shocked. She sat for the longest time just staring into mid air. Alan just watched her; he had an inkling what Caroline might be doing and he would certainly play along if it moved Celia.

"Alan, she can't do this. What about me?"

"Well Celia I think you've answered that yourself. You have a great daughter, she has a lovely partner and they are going to have a new family. We should be very happy for her. Instead all you do is make the lass feel ashamed and unhappy. She doesn't even want to be in her own home anymore; nowhere near us because she doesn't want you to hurt the person she loves."

Caroline picked up her phone and rang Kate. "Hi sweetheart; phase one implemented."

"What did you say?"

"Exactly what I told you I would. I think she's suitably shocked. I reckon Alan is on to me and our little plan but I'm pretty sure he'll play along. I think the poor man is so fed up with it all."

"Are you sure it won't all backfire? I don't want to be the cause of a total breakdown between you and your mum."

"Kate it isn't your fault. If it does all go sour she's only got herself to blame. I've got to go now and cook dinner, the kids are starving. Ring me when you're in bed. Love you."

Half way through cooking dinner, the house phone rang; William answered it and walked into the kitchen, "its Angus's mum for you," and handed it to his mother.

"Jane, how are you?"

"I'm fine Caroline. I'm just calling about this weekend. Are you sure you want Angus at Kate's place? "

"How, how do you..."

"Caroline, don't worry. Bill and I have had a couple of conversations with Lawrence in the past few weeks. Angus told us about you and Kate and how Lawrence is struggling. Bill has a very good friend who is gay and in a long term relationship; the boys have both met them. So we've assured him that while we understand how he feels at the moment, he will feel differently once he gets used to it. Kate is a lovely woman, we've met her several times through school and honestly Caroline, if you don't mind me being personal; you've got a beauty!"

"Thanks Jane, yes I'm certainly blessed to have her. Has Lawrence told you that we are pregnant too?

"Yes, and congratulations to you both; it must be the best feeling, especially for Kate."

"Yes she's over the moon and once I got used to the idea, well I can't wait. Back to your original question, yes we're fine for Angus to come over; he's a great kid and a good influence on Lawrence. Can I just say too that I'm so grateful to you and Bill for all the time you give him."

"Caroline we're very fond of him and it was hard for you all when John buggered off. We admire you for having Angus as such a part of your family too especially as you are his Principal. It's quite an intrusion into your private life."

"Not at all; he's very respectful and discrete. So no worries about this weekend, Kate's happy about it too."

"OK, keep me posted about the babies?"

"Will do, thanks Jane."

What a lovely call Caroline mused as she went back to her cooking and made a mental note to tell Kate about it. This is what she missed a lot, just being able to tell her things right there and then.

"Alan, what am I going to do? Caroline has never thought of going away like this before; even at university she was only a few hours' drive away."

"Well Celia, I've told you, the lass is just protecting herself and Kate. They want their children to be around people who love them. You know Kate's going to need a lot of support with twins, especially when Caroline goes back to work; there isn't really anybody here being as how you feel the way you do."

"Well, what can I do? It sickens me to think about how folk are going to talk about them and how she's going to make a fool of herself at work. She might even get thrown out."

"All the more reason we should support them then. Come on Celia, its nowt these days, nobody bothers."

"Oh they do, they just don't say it to your face." Alan just sighed. It was going to be a long played out game he suspected.

 **The plot thickens**

Caroline walked out of her bathroom just in time to pick up her phone. "Hello, are you in bed?"

"Just going; I've had my shower. Are you?"

"Yep, I'm a bit tired tonight so I decided to turn in. I wish you were here Caroline."

"I wish I was there too, you know that. I hate the nights we're apart. It can't go on much longer, no matter how my plot thickens. How are the jelly beans?"

"No problem; eating and sleeping, I thought I felt a little kick, but it's far too early."

Caroline slipped into bed and settled herself up on the pillows. She had taken to leaning her head against Kate's pillow as it smelled of her and somehow it was comforting.

"Kate, do you remember the night Anna stayed with us?"

Kate knew exactly where this was going and in her most sultry voice said."Yes."

"I think I might be missing you as much as she missed Leroy."

"Is that right? Well I think I might be missing you as much as he missed her."

After a few loving exchanges and a discussion about what they wished they were doing to each other, Kate decided that she'd rather wait a couple of nights for the real thing. "I need to look at you Caroline, that's what I really love, watching you, knowing that I can see you relax, see you feel me and want me."

"Ok I suppose I can wait. Sleep well, see you tomorrow. Do you think we'll manage lunch together?"

"Fraid not, I've got choir." One final phone kiss and they hung up.

The next evening, there was a knock at Kate's door. As she looked through the glass panels she saw the familiar figure of Celia standing there.

"Have you got a minute or two?"

Kate invited her in and they both sat down in the lounge. Kate wrapped her arm protectively across her stomach as if trying to shield her little ones from any negativity they might hear.

"Does Caroline know you're here?"

"No she doesn't. I wanted to talk to you. I suppose you know she told me she's thinking of taking a job in America and you two moving there?"

"Yes I know she told you. She also told me how you responded." Kate left that hanging.

"Kate, she's my only child, she's all I've got, her and the boys. Do you have any idea how it feels for me to have this hanging over my head?"

"Yes Celia, I'm my mother's only child and I and these babies are all she's got. So yes, I understand."

"I can't let her do this. I'm asking you not to take her away."

"Celia, I'm not taking her away, you're driving her and us away. I would be happy to live at Conway Drive with the boys and our babies. My mother is happy to travel over here regularly to see us. But, and it's a big but, I want Caroline to be happy; I want our babies to be happy and feel loved and accepted. Do you know how many nights she's been in my arms crying about you and how hurtful your words can be? She hurts for me and for herself. She loves you, you're her mother but you seem to need to control her. It makes it worse for her when my mother calls us, she can't help but hear and see the difference."

Celia sighed. "I just know that she's going to make a fool of herself and probably lose all the professional standing she has. People talk whether we like it or not."

"Do you love Alan? Did you think it was romantic when you got together again after all those years?"

"Well yes I suppose we did."

"There could be people out there laughing at two old folk being romantic and saying to themselves 'you'd think at their age they'd know better'"

"Well one of the joys of getting older is that you care less and less what people think."

"Caroline and I don't care what people think either, except those we love, our family and close friends. So far, those people who do know are delighted for us; except for you that is.

Celia, I love Caroline more than anything; if I thought it would be better for her, I would leave her at the cost of my own happiness. But, I know that she's in love with me, she's happy and content, she excited about our future together, including our babies. We've both been married but neither of us has felt this before.

She just needs you to acknowledge that and support us. We're not asking you to be dancing in the street, just to treat us with love and respect and enjoy seeing your daughter happy."

A moment or two later, Kate's phone rang. "Excuse me a minute Celia, that'll be Caroline and she'll worry if I don't pick up."

She answered the phone and was quickly hit by an angry voice, "Is my mother there?"

"Yes, yes she is."

"Well what the hell..."

"Caroline, it's alright, don't get het up we're just talking."

"Can I speak to her?" Kate handed the phone over to Celia. "Mum what are you doing there? You'd better not be upsetting Kate."

"No love, I'm not upsetting Kate, more the other way around, I suppose; she's telling me stuff it's hard to hear." She handed the phone back to Kate.

"Caroline, I'll ring you back later darling, I'm OK really." She hung up.

There was an uncomfortable silence between them for a while until Celia broke it. "I don't know how to get through this. I'd better go. Please don't stop coming to the house; at least that; I won't make you uncomfortable. I'll have to talk to Caroline about the rest." With that, she left.

Caroline paced about in her bedroom willing her phone to ring. Eventually she was put out of her misery when Kate rang and told her everything. Caroline was initially angry about the intrusion but then calmed down when Kate explained what she had said and how Celia had responded.

"Well OK, I'm not going to pursue her she'll have to come to me."

They decided to stay at Conway Drive for the weekend, given what Celia had said and that the boys were with them; it would give Lawrence and Angus more space.

Caroline had organised to take Kate out to a special restaurant on Saturday night and they were very much looking forward to it. Kate had no idea what Caroline had in mind for the evening.

The waiter showed them to a secluded table as requested. Kate was dazzled by the opulence of the place and the wonderful menu. "Wow this is very special Caroline; I didn't even know it existed."

"Yes, Gavin brought me here for lunch, the day I signed my contract as Principal of Sulgrave. I've squirreled it away for a special occasion; or in your case a special person. Now, no expense spared my darling, get stuck into all the yummy things you fancy."

They enjoyed a spectacular meal and as the waiter took away the last of their dishes, Caroline excused herself on the pretext of going to the bathroom. After coming back and sitting down, she looked over at the waiter and he arrived at the table with a tray on which were two glasses of champagne, a rose, and a small box. He gave each of them a glass, placed the rose in front of Kate and handed the box to Caroline. He smiled discretely and then left. Kate's heart began to pound and as she looked across she noticed her lover's eyes glistening with tears. Caroline's eyes never left Kate's as she opened the box revealing an exquisite diamond ring. She leaned across the table "Will you marry me my darling?"

Kate stared at the ring for some moments, she looked up at Caroline and smiled; "Of course I will." Caroline slipped the ring on Kate's finger and held her hand up to her lips. "I'm so happy; I want to marry you before our babies come into the world."

As they drove home they hardly spoke. Kate had her hand firmly on Caroline's thigh, as if she needed to be connected; staring at her ring, almost drunk with the love she felt at that moment.

They popped their heads around the lounge door and said goodnight to the boys who were engrossed in a movie and then went upstairs as quickly as they could. They'd hardly closed the door before Kate pulled Caroline into her arms and kissed her tenderly. "What have I ever done to deserve this, and you?"

"What have you done? I'm the one who's overwhelmed at what you've brought into my life and how happy you make me. As Jane said, 'you've got a beauty'; but you're not just any beauty; I've got the best there is."

Their passion rose to the surface and they could hardly manage to take their clothes off. They made love until they were exhausted; until they felt they'd given everything they could. "I can't wait to marry you", Caroline whispered as she stroked the hair off Kate's face; feeling the beads of perspiration. She reached for a tissue and gently dabbed the drops from her face; kissing each inch as she did.

"Let's not wait. Since you asked me I feel so excited about being married to you."

They slept soundly, bodies locked around each other; nothing between them; skin on skin, as they hoped it would always be.

After they had all finished breakfast, the boys said they were going in to Leeds for the day. Kate and Caroline decided to take a ride to the farm. Kate knew all about the 'step sister' but had never met her or the extended family. Gillian had been pestering Caroline for ages to bring her girlfriend up to meet them all. She knew about the pregnancy and all about Celia's resistance to it all. Caroline had phoned ahead to tell Gillian they were coming.

Just as they were finishing cleaning up and preparing to leave, came the familiar tap on the kitchen window.

Caroline looked up;"God, what does she want now?"

"Caroline, give her a chance, don't jump to conclusions."

Celia came in and sat with them for a few moments. "Are you home today Caroline?"

"No mum, Gillian has invited us to the farm; she's been wanting to meet Kate for a while now."

"Oh I was hoping to have a chat with you; that's all."

"Sorry mum, maybe tomorrow."

Suddenly Celia's eyes fell onto the shining diamond on Kate's finger. She felt herself losing breath. "That's a lovely ring Kate." She was hoping for a reason it was there other than what she dreaded might come. It was not to be.

"Yes Celia, it's absolutely stunning isn't it. I'm a very lucky woman."

Caroline looked her mother in the eye, "I asked Kate to marry me mum and she said yes."

Celia was utterly defeated.


	7. Chapter 7

**In the Beginning – Chapter Seven**

 **Up to the farm**

The dog ran out of the barn and began to bark, alerting Gillian to Caroline and Kate's arrival. She shouted to anyone who might be listening, "They're 'ere!"

She went to the window and looking into the yard, saw Caroline lean over and kiss Kate before they got out of the car. She watched as they walked over to the cottage hand in hand, only letting go as they reached the front door. She was impressed at how beautiful Kate was, tall and regal with her gorgeous milk chocolate skin. "Wow" she heard herself say.

Raff and Ellie emerged from the lounge and stood behind Gillian at the front door. Robbie, who had heard the car pull up, strode over from the barn. Gillian opened the front door and ushered them inside. There was a peck on the cheek for Caroline and a hearty handshake for Kate before they moved into the front room and sat down.

"Goodness this is a lovely spot Gillian," Kate enthused.

"Yea, we're lucky 'til the bitter winter winds nearly blow us off our feet; but I wouldn't be anywhere else though."

Caroline's eyes swept the group, looking for signs of their reactions to Kate; ever protective. She needn't have worried as they all engaged with her immediately; asking her about her family and background, as any self respecting northern family would, no holding back there.

After a while, Gillian got up announcing that she was about to make the inevitable cup of tea. Caroline excused herself and followed her into the kitchen.

"Well, well you've done alright for yourself haven't you?" Gillian asked.

"Sure have, she's so lovely Gillian, I can't believe how lovely she is. I've got some news for you too; we've got engaged since I last spoke to you."

"Blimey, Caroline that's great, does Celia know?"

"Yes, we told her just before we left; by the look on her face, I'd say she was suitably shocked. Coming here today will give her time to think about it before she has a go at me."

"When did this happen?"

"Last night, I took her out to a restaurant and proposed. It was very romantic even though I say it myself."

"Obviously she said yes!" Gillian chuckled.

"Well, I wanted us to be married before the babies are born. It makes it, well you know, official."

They carried the tray into the front room and gave everyone their tea.

"Caroline tells me congratulations are in order?"

"Yes, thank you. We're both very happy." Kate said as she held out her hand for them all to admire her sparkling diamond."

"So when's it going to be; this wedding?" Gillian asked

"Oh we haven't got round to that yet. We've got to talk with the boys and give Kate's mum plenty of warning as she has to come from New York. Then of course there's my mother to contend with. We're just going to enjoy it all for the moment."

"What about your job Caroline?" Robbie asked gently.

"I don't think there'll be a problem, especially if we are married, but I'll have to speak to the Chairman of the Board of Governors. Actually, in all truth, I don't really care; I love my job but I love us more and if I have to move, well so be it."

Gillian stood up at that point and looked out of the window. "Do you fancy a walk around the place; it; looks like it could rain later? Did you two bring your wellies Caroline?"

Caroline laughed; "I don't own a pair of wellies."

"No self respecting Yorkshire lass doesn't have a pair of wellies, even if they are the green shooting set kind. Come on I'll sort you both out with some."

They left the cottage and started to walk up into the hills. Gillian led the way and as she turned she saw them tightly holding each other's hand as they climbed up the slope behind her. She grinned to herself; it was something else seeing Caroline like this; love struck.

Kate asked lots of questions about the sheep; the breed and how old they were and how many they had etc. She was keen to appear interested in this other side of Caroline's family.

When they reached the top, the view was spectacular. The wind blew their hair all over the place and turned their cheeks crimson, but it felt good; getting all the cobwebs blown away. There's always something very cleansing about being in the wind on the tops. "Caroline, Celia's not going to deal with this very well is she?"

"No I don't think so but I can't let her dictate my life; not anymore."

"I know me dad's fed up with it. He told me how he gets so upset when she talks to you like she does."

Kate interjected here; "Alan's so lovely Gillian and tries his best to be happy and support us, but it must be very hard for him; being the meat in the sandwich."

"All you have to remember Caroline is that she's got more to lose than you. Just don't give in." Gillian encouraged.

They walked back down to the house and it smelt delicious as they went in. Robbie was a good cook and had finished the roast while they were out.

"Kate, I forgot to ask, you're not vegetarian are you?"

"No Robbie, thanks, I can't do nuts that's all."

"She's very allergic believe me, I came back from watching a school production one night and kissed Kate when I got in and she had an anaphylactic turn, I'd only eaten a couple of peanuts in the interval." She grinned as she remembered the look on Lawrence's face when he walked in and saw Kate on the floor with his mother rubbing her inside leg; she decided not to elaborate.

Kate sat close to Calamity's high chair and offered to help feed her while they had lunch. Ellie was happy to have someone else do it while she ate. Caroline watched as the baby giggled when Kate played aeroplanes with her spoon; thinking what a lovely mother she would be in just a few short months.

When lunch was over, Gillian and Caroline engineered it so they could have some time together in the kitchen.

"You might hear something from your dad or my mum."

"What?"

"Well I've told my mother that there's a job going at Columbia University in New York, where Kate's mum lectures. I've said I'm thinking of applying; taking Kate and Lawrence if he wants and relocating there for a couple of years."

"God Caroline is that true?"

"No, well technically it could be, but I just want my mother to understand that Kate comes first and if she makes my home life untenable for us then we're going. Neither of us wants to but I'm not going to let Kate and our babies feel like second class citizens."

"Wow, it's a lot you're taking on Caz; don't know if I could do it at my age; which of course happens to be the same as yours."

"Well I hadn't planned it but Kate really wanted a child and would have gone ahead without me anyway, so it was a package deal; just a bigger package than either of us expected."

"Well, she seems really lovely and the way you look at her; well it's pretty obvious you've lost it."

"Yep, I'm a goner that's for sure."

"So if Celia asks me about America what do you want me to say?"

"Just tell her you know about it; that I told you; that's all."

They spent the rest of the afternoon chatting and playing with Calamity. Kate seemed a natural and the baby was happy to play with her. She even dozed off in Kate's arms; Caroline looked over and thought to herself 'lucky baby'.

Dusk was just coming down as they started their trip home. At one point they passed a recessed lookout and Caroline pulled off the road and parked. "Do you realise I've just shared one of my precious weekend days reserved for you, with Gillian's crowd? I think I deserve a reward for that."

"I think it was an enormous sacrifice for both of us and I absolutely think we need a reward. What did you have in mind?" Kate whispered into her neck.

"Well, there's no-one around and it will be dark in about ten minutes."

"Caroline! I haven't done this, snogging and groping in the back of a car, since I was a teenager."

"I was hoping for more than a snog and a quick grope." They both giggled like those very same teenagers.

Caroline's car was quite sophisticated and so all she needed to do was press a button and the seats gently fell backwards until they were both almost lying flat.

"Kate?"

"Yea"

"Do you realise that in five months this kind of spontaneity will be impossible for the next ten years or so? We'll have permanent car seat boosters for five at least."

Kate laughed drawing Caroline close and kissing her nose. "Well my love, I suggest we make the most of it. In a couple of months I'll be too big to even think of crawling around the back of a car."

"We've never done this before; it's quite a turn on" Caroline said as she opened the buttons of Kate's shirt.

Soon the windows were completely fogged up and despite the howling wind, anyone close would hear the cries of delight emanating from the vehicle; fortunately they had the car park to themselves. On the drive home, Caroline couldn't help but reflect on the surge of sexual energy she had these days, what this exquisite woman did to her. It was many years since she'd felt such constant hunger.

 **Let's get it over with**

Celia was sitting at the kitchen bench when the women walked in.

"Where've you been? I rang the farm about an hour ago and Gillian said you'd left half an hour before."

"Oh we had to make detour on the way home. Kate needed to get something." Kate crinkled up her nose and gave Caroline a sideways glance.

"I'm going upstairs if you'll excuse me; I've got some stuff to sort out for tomorrow." Kate left them alone. She was hoping they would talk for a while.

"Well, how did you get on at the farm? How did they take to Kate?"

"Great mum, we had a very relaxing time; they all got on well together and were happy for us when we told them we're engaged."

"Right then well it seems I'm the odd one out; everybody else says how marvellous it is and how happy they are but you have to wonder what they really think, you know deep down, what they're thinking about the two of you."

"Mum, I don't really care about all these so called people who disapprove on the quiet. I've told you and I will spell it out again. Kate and I are very happy together. I can't remember ever being so relaxed and positive about myself and life in general. I know it's hard for you and perhaps a few other people, but I won't change my mind.

As to the babies; it's true it wasn't on my radar but I'm thrilled and excited now. Kate is over the moon, she's waited so long and now it's going to happen for her and I want to be there right in the thick of it supporting her."

"Well I suppose there's nothing I can do to stop it then is there?"

"No mum, there really isn't."

"I know you're playing games with me about this New York caper. I can't take that seriously Caroline."

"Mum. I don't want to go to New York but I will if I have to. That's it in a nutshell."

"Don't go Caroline. I'll try my best to deal with this, but you'll have to give me time."

"OK but you already know the ground rules. Just try and get it. Try seeing Kate for the lovely person she is and not keep dwelling on our relationship. You have no idea how many times she tries to calm me down and defends you; telling me to take things slowly and not be too hard on you."

Celia got up and walked over to the door to go back to her flat. As she did she turned and said "I do love you, you know."

Caroline nodded and thought to herself 'if you only knew how tired and worn that statement is getting'. She switched off the lights and went upstairs. All she wanted at this point was her bed, Kate beside her and a good book.

 **The last hurdle**

"As Caroline put the finishing touches to her make-up, she looked at Kate; "Today's the day; I have a meeting scheduled with Gavin for eleven. Now that you are six months and showing we can't really wait any longer. Besides I want to tell people now, I'm ready to just run with it all and be open."

"Ok darling, you know I'll be thinking of you and if you need or want me to come up and be with you while you speak to him, you know I will."

"Has Mary Watson mentioned anymore about you putting weight on?"

"No Caroline but she's not stupid and neither are all the other women who've been pregnant, they know one when they see one. Thank God it's baggy jumper weather."

"Well hopefully by the end of the day you'll be able to tell them the whole romantic story. See you at the car," laughing as she left the room.

Since Caroline's talk with Celia, they had been living together permanently but on a bit of a trial to see if Lawrence was OK. He had decided it wasn't that bad, Kate was OK and he'd be fine. Kate was about to put her house up for lease as they had decided not to sell it for the time being.

John was being the greatest bugbear to things going smoothly with the house. He hadn't come to terms with Caroline's new love and life and certainly not to two more children. He'd always wanted more, hoped for a little girl, but his wife had said no she'd had enough at two. Now here she was ready to be a mother again. His only recourse to any kind of fight back was to hold things up with the house. He'd agreed to let them buy his half but he was stringing the process out. Caroline was sure it was because it gave him excuses to ring her and sometimes turn up at the house. However, she was determined to remain calm and just let him ride out his tantrum. He would get tired of it soon enough.

Beverley showed Gavin in at eleven and Caroline came from the back of her desk to sit in the armchairs with him.

"Well this looks ominous Caroline."

"Well, its personal and so I'd rather make it a bit less formal."

"Okay, I'm all ears; just don't tell me you're resigning."

"Well you might want to discuss that when I finished." She blushed and smiled at him.

"Okay so here goes. For the last eighteen months or so I have been in a relationship with a staff member here. You know John and I separated and divorced some time ago."

Before she could go any further, Gavin interjected.

"I hope I'm not wrong, but its Kate McKenzie isn't it Caroline?"

Her mouth fell open and she remained speechless for a few seconds. "How did you know that?"

"Caroline a number of people mentioned it to me over the last few months. If I can be very personal, they know a woman in love when they see one; or in this case two!"

"Well erm how did they feel, how do you feel?"

"Caroline you have been very discrete as far as I can tell but there are also rumours that Kate is pregnant. Is she?"

Caroline had a good relationship with Gavin and knew that they could talk about stuff that others might see as an intrusion into their lives.

"Yes she is; she's six months now and won't be able to conceal it any longer. We're having twins and that will show much quicker than a single pregnancy."

"Wow Caroline; how are feeling about it all?"

"I'm thrilled, very thrilled for Kate and more than happy to be part of it. They'll be our children Gavin."

They continued to discuss the protocol around it all. Gavin himself was very supportive but he was also aware that there would be others, on the board and on staff who may find it all confronting. He suggested they steer a cautious course. But he did reassure Caroline that as she and Kate were to be married there would be absolutely no grounds for dismissal.

"Do you think we could get Kate up here for a few minutes? I'd love to see her and wish her well."

Caroline buzzed through to Beverley and asked her to fetch Kate and get someone to replace her if she was in class. Beverley grinned from ear to ear; she had been longing to be part of the excitement. She was very fond of Caroline and thought Kate was a perfect complement to her personality. A few minutes later Kate walked into the room. Gavin got up and greeted her. "Kate, congratulations, I'm so pleased for you; well in fact both of you. I do hope it all goes well."

"Thanks Gavin. We are both very excited about it all and it's been hard to keep it all under wraps."

"Well I want you to feel free now to talk about things. Caroline and I will deal with any fall out. I hope there won't be any but one can never tell."

Gavin decided to set up a meeting with the Board and ask the school's Deputy Principal to come along as well. Everyone would be on the same page then.

When they got home that evening, they poured themselves a drink and sat in the lounge to talk.

"Well; that seemed to go well Caroline. Gavin didn't appear to have any problems."

"No in theory he doesn't; he's genuinely happy for us. All we can hope for is that we can deal with any folk who are upset. I just hope they stay away from you my darling."

"Beverley was so excited when she came to get me. She asked me loads of questions, said she couldn't wait any longer. She's such a sweetie."

All of a sudden Kate sat bolt upright. "Quick Caroline, give me your hand."

She put Caroline's hand over her tummy and sure enough her palm was given a strong kicking by one of the munchkins.

They smiled and leaned into each other kissing gently, "I can hardly believe it Caroline. It feels like a miracle; only weeks away and I will be someone's mum."

Caroline held her tightly her eyes filling with tears at the sheer beauty of it all.


	8. Chapter 8

**In the Beginning –Chapter Eight**

 **The two of us**

 _Thank you for all your reviews and PMs and encouragement._

They sat in the familiar waiting room of the radiography suite waiting for their turn. It was the second trimester scan and they had made a decision to find out the sex of the babies this time. Caroline was chaffing at the bit, more than Kate even, to start buying all the stuff they would need and she was keen to know what colours they should be looking at.

"Kate Mckenzie"

"Here we go, come on darling." Kate led the way and got herself organised on the bed.

"Good to see you both again. How have you been Kate?"

"Really well thanks Kylie. The morning sickness didn't last too long and so far everything else seems normal. We'd like to know the sex this time if you don't mind. There's a certain someone who's dying to start shopping."

Caroline smiled coyly at Kylie. She had never said anything to Kate but she was secretly hoping for at least one girl. John had pestered the life out of her for another child, carping on about how he wanted a little girl. She wasn't keen on another child; her career was just starting to take off and as she was often left to do the bulk of the parenting, she had said no. God knows she could just as likely have another boy and then what; just keep going 'til she produced girl?

"Here we go ladies, there they are. Much easier to see this time; they both look healthy and are developing very well. There's a good strong heartbeat coming from both of them and they look to be about the same size; all good markers. Now what I can tell you is that you are having twin girls."

Kate turned to look at Caroline, she had a feeling that she was secretly hoping for a baby girl. Kate herself didn't care as long as they were healthy. Caroline was grinning like a cheshire cat. They held each other's gaze for a few seconds, a look of total joy.

"Your job now Kate is to get these little ones to their thirty two week scan. We then start to monitor them more carefully. Twins are notorious for their rush to get out into the world; I reckon they get cramped in there. Thirty two weeks also gets them to a viable size. Anything past thirty six is a real bonus."

"Ok I'm sure we can manage that," Caroline replied. She would do everything in her power to keep Kate safe for the next three months.

As they were leaving, Caroline suggest they go into Harrogate to do some shopping, "let's go and buy you some nice maternity outfits; and then go to the baby shop and pick out some of the things we'll need to get."

"I think I'm ok for clothes at the moment, and don't forget what the woman in the baby shop said, we should wait to buy the big ticket items until I was closer to delivery."

"Well yes, but she also said we could choose our stuff and then just ring and order it in when we were ready."

Kate knew she was fighting a losing battle and despite not really being in the mood for shopping, she didn't want to spoil Caroline's excitement; so they set off into Harrogate.

Kate was eventually persuaded to buy three rather smart outfits which hugged her figure in contrast to the baggy clothes she'd been wearing. She looked magnificent in them, and Caroline was reminded all over again why she was so in love. Similarly they spent a couple of hours in the baby shop choosing prams and car capsules and cots. Kate was dismayed at how much all this was going to cost; however Caroline simply muttered away about her children having the best.

They got home early evening and as soon as they had unloaded all the shopping and put everything away they kicked off their shoes and headed for the sofa. Caroline insisted that Kate put her feet up while she brought her a cuppa.

"Only two more working days and its half term Caroline I can hardly believe how quickly the time is going. It'll be good to have a week off I can start getting the nursery ready."

"You might want to reconsider that. I've got a little something for you; a gift for reaching our second trimester." She handed an envelope to Kate.

"What have you done now?" leaning in for a kiss.

"Open it and see."

Kate opened the envelope and her heart nearly stopped. Two return tickets to New York leaving the day after school finished.

"Caroline, my God, this is amazing; how have you managed all this without me knowing?"

"With great difficulty, mostly because I was dying to tell you. I got Beverley to do all the arrangements so you wouldn't see anything. Your mum is in on it too as I had to check, that she would be available."

"My mum! She knows we're going?

"Yep; she's known for two weeks, as have Lawrence and William. I've checked it out with the airline and you're all clear to fly. She's never seen you pregnant Kate and it's something she's so overjoyed about."

Kate kissed her passionately. "I love you so much; thank you."

"You, my love, are doing all the hard work of carrying our children. There isn't a better gift than that for me. So you deserve everything you get. Can you try on your new outfits for me again; you looked very sexy in them in the shop."

Kate peeled off her clothes and put on one of the dresses they had bought. It was a deep purple wrap over and her baby bump was very clearly there. Caroline bent over and kissed her tummy, "Your mummy looks gorgeous."

Just then, Celia came into the room, trying not to look at her daughter attached to Kate's stomach. "Hello, the boys let me in."

"Hello Celia, come and join us. I'm just trying on some new maternity clothes we bought today."

"Well it's very nice, of course in my day we didn't wear anything that would show off our stomachs like they do today."

"Kate looks fabulous mum; pregnancy has made her even more beautiful if that's possible." She was determined to counteract every hint of criticism or negativity. Celia just sighed.

Then, she noticed the tickets on the table. "Are you going somewhere?" she asked nodding towards them.

"Yes, on Saturday, we're going to New York, just the two of us, for a week to see Ginika."

The colour drained out of Celia's face and she looked on the verge of tears.

"It's Ok Celia, we're coming back. Caroline wanted my mum to have some time with us during the pregnancy, you know, given my history."

"Oh right, I see. Are they letting you fly in your condition?"

"Mum, Kate hasn't got a condition, she's pregnant; yes I've checked with the airline and its fine."

"Well what's happening to the boys?"

Caroline took great pains to explain that William was not planning to come home from University that week anyway and Lawrence was having half a week at Angus's and the other half with his father.

"Do Angus's parents know about you two and the babies?"

"Of course they do mum and they're thrilled for us. In fact they've been helping Lawrence to come to terms with it all. Bill, Angus's dad has been wonderful with him. More than can be said for his own father."

Another sigh; another defeat for Celia.

 **Victories and Freedoms**

Kate walked in to the staffroom the next morning, dressed in one of her new outfits; Caroline had insisted on it. It was high time Kate had the pleasure of sharing her pregnancy. She'd hardly got her things on her desk when Mary Watson, a young thirty something first time mum sidled up to Kate. "I knew it McKenzie!" giving her a big hug.

Kate laughed. "It's been complicated Mer, sorry I couldn't tell you before."

"So who's the lucky bloke that's flashing diamonds at you and getting you up the duff?"

"Caroline Elliot actually." Mary stood speechless for more than a few seconds. "Caroline! You mean our Caroline?"

"Yes, the very same. We're engaged to be married and these are our babies."

"Babies plural?" "Yep twins."

"God Kate that's wonderful. I'm so happy for you, both of you. I'd heard rumours but never paid any attention. People have been saying how great Caroline looks these days but we all put it down to her getting a divorce. Now it all makes sense. How long..."

"Over eighteen months."

Mary (Mer) and Kate were good friends at school and Kate had been dying to confirm the suspicions she knew Mary had. It felt good to tell someone on staff; someone she trusted.

Caroline in the meantime had literally waltzed into her office beckoning for Beverley to follow her. She opened her handbag and pulled out an envelope and handed it to her secretary. "Open it, go on"

Beverley opened it and took out a photograph of the previous day's scan. "Well what do you see?"

"Caroline, two! Kate's having twins?" "Yes she is; we are." Beverley began to tear up Caroline took pity on her and against all her professional boundaries, gave her a hug.

"I'm so happy for you both. I've noticed such a change in you these past few months Caroline, you're positively radiant and relaxed and happy. Kate's a beautiful person, inside and out and you deserve each other."

Beverley almost floated out of the room. Caroline smiled to herself. She wondered why she'd waited so long.

Just after the morning tea bell rang, she heard a commotion in Beverley's office and heard," well I'm sure she won't mind." The next minute her intercom rang and Beverley said there were some staff members who would like a quick word.

Mary Watson, followed by three other women on staff, marched in and stood in front of Caroline. "We're dispensing with all formalities today Caroline Elliot, we are here to say, you had no right keeping this amazing love story and good news from us! We're so happy for both you and Kate."

Caroline blushed like never before and smiled at them. "Thank you all, that's very lovely of you. Yes we are very happy and really looking forward to our babies arriving."

"No more hiding, we'll be tying Kate down until we get every last detail out of her. We want to know all about it."

"Erm well I hope she doesn't tell you everything if you don't mind. I have to retain some aura of mystery as your Principal."

They all chuckled and left the office. Caroline felt wonderful; her first open conversation and it was so positive.

Kate popped in a few minutes later. "I gather you've had an intervention?"

"Yep, it was very sweet of them; however they are about to start poking you for information about us and how we got together etc. You will be a little circumspect won't you?"

"Do you need to ask?"

"No sorry darling. I'm just getting used to it that's all." She walked over and cuddled Kate, kissing her gently. Beverley halted her march into Caroline's office, melting at what she saw.

When they arrived home from school, they noticed John's car in the drive. Lawrence hopped out and went to greet his father. "Oh God what does he want now." Caroline said with no small hint of exasperation.

They all trouped into the house, losing handbags, school bags and coats on the way. John followed them into the kitchen.

"Hi, hope you don't mind me coming round. Wow, Kate look at you, you really are pregnant."

"Do you think she's been pretending for the last six months, a phantom pregnancy?"

"Caroline don't, it's OK." Kate could never get over how protective Caroline was; it was razor sharp and instant.

"Could I have word in private please, Caroline?"

"Why? Anything you have to say, you can say it in front of Kate."

"Please?"

Kate nodded to her to go ahead and went upstairs.

John followed her in to the lounge and shut the door behind him. "Lawrence has told me that you and Kate are engaged and expecting twin girls."

"Yes and yes."

"Caroline you told me you didn't want any more children."

"At the time I didn't and in case it's escaped you, I'm not the one who's pregnant John."

"No but you're calling them 'our babies'; I don't understand that, they can't be yours; it's biologically impossible."

"Well it's true they won't have my genes, but I can assure you, we made them together."

"Stop it Caroline. You don't have to rub it in."

"Well why are you asking me about it all?"

"I'm just very upset. You know I wanted a little girl, and I certainly didn't want to get divorced. This could have been us Caroline, you and me together again having another baby."

"John, it would never have happened. As to the divorce, well you have only got yourself to blame for that."

"It's still not too late you know Caroline."

"John, sit down and let me tell you something. This is the very last time I will discuss this with you, EVER. I was devastated when you left; I thought we had a reasonably good marriage. I was struggling to come to terms with it when Kate came along and helped me. I fell madly in love with her and she with me and we still are; she's everything to me along with our children. That will never change. I'm marrying her and we are having twin girls. I couldn't be happier and I've never felt more relaxed, more myself. I'm sorry you're suffering, I really am but there's nothing, absolutely nothing I can or want to do about it." With that she left.

Another defeat; Caroline felt strong and confident. She put it down to the great day she and Kate had at school; the wonderful affirmation they'd received and the freedom she'd felt, not having to hide anymore and being able to shout from the rooftops that she loved this wonderful woman.


	9. Chapter 9

**New York**

"Caroline come on we have to leave in five minutes." Kate shouted up the stairs. They were driving to Manchester Airport and Kate was worried about the traffic; she didn't want anything to delay her from getting to her mother.

They stood at the check in desk and the clerk took their tickets and passports; she was swift and efficient; she then asked for the medical clearance form which Caroline duly produced from her bag. Once all the checking was done, the woman's demeanour changed and she smiled at them; "Congratulations both of you; I've managed to get you seats with extra leg room, we want mum here to be comfortable." Kate smiled at her kindly.

As they sat in the waiting area, Caroline asked Kate with a puzzled look; "How did she know we're a couple? I could have been your sister; well no, maybe your best friend."

"Caroline, sweetheart; I'm a grown woman; I appear reasonably independent and intelligent, right? So when you are the one carrying the tickets and my passport; pulling out my medical clearance; having your arm around my back and lifting our luggage on to the scales and looking at me with love; what do you think she's going to assume?"

"Oh right, yes. I really need to get used to it all; it's another universe for me."

They had a pleasant flight, both of them dozing off after the meal; it had been crazy the night before, getting the house organised, taking Lawrence to Angus's and then all their packing. Caroline could see how excited Kate was and she was pleased with herself for thinking of this.

Ginika was at the airport to meet them and the moment Kate set eyes on her mother she let go of her trolley and flew into her arms. There were copious tears from both of them; Caroline stood back taking it all in.

"Caroline, come here, I'm so happy to finally see you in the flesh." She hugged Caroline and kissed her several times on the cheek. Caroline couldn't help but feel deeply the contrast with the way her mother behaved towards Kate.

They went straight to her apartment so they could settle in and freshen up. In their bedroom, Kate held on to Caroline as the tears started again. "I don't know what's wrong with me Caroline, I just feel so overwhelmed."

"Of course you will it's understandable; just seeing your mum again is enough, but being able to see and feel her joy about the babies, is overwhelming for both of you. Not to mention the hormones of course." She stroked her face and wiped her tears.

They spent their evening having dinner and chatting to Ginika. She wanted to know all about their relationship and getting pregnant. Kate seemed comfortable sharing very intimate details with her; at one point explaining to her mother that they had been able to conceive naturally and do it together. Caroline surprisingly was fine with the conversation; as there was only love and support from Ginika.

The time flew by very quickly. Caroline was introduced to quite a number of Kate's extended family and they were all welcoming and supportive. She also spent hours talking with Ginika especially if Kate took time out to rest or went to see one of her favourite cousins. Ginika was a very well read and interesting academic and Caroline revelled in their conversations. However, it was their mutual love of Kate that often came to the fore. Ginika recalled how difficult it had been for her to conceive Kate and that she too had suffered through two miscarriages. She knew only too well what Kate was feeling at finally being able to have a child.

"I was the opposite, Ginika, mine came almost without warning, very easy once we decided to try. My biggest problem was making sure I didn't have any more. John refused to take any precautions; that was his way of protesting against me not wanting to get pregnant again, what with him wanting a little girl. So it was all up to me and I found it a real burden."

"Sounds like an idiot to me; Kate's told me a bit about him and how intrusive he can be. It's hard I guess when he's your children's father."

"Kate is very happy with you Caroline. That's all I care about, that and now my grandchildren to be. When I can't be close myself, it helps to know she's with you, and I know you'll take good care of them."

One day Ginika brought up the idea of them waiting to get married until the babies were born. "Why don't you two wait, it is hard enough for you getting ready for the babies, let alone planning for a wedding."

Kate had been resolute, "Mum, we want to be married soon. Apart from the fact that it's what we both dream of, it will be safer for the twins if Caroline is my wife, you know, if anything were to go wrong."

They both turned on her dismissing even the notion of anything happening. "Oh well, I guess I've got two trips from New York in the next three months." Ginika sighed; the was no point in trying to change their minds.

The dreaded day came when they had to leave. Caroline stood at the departure gate, tears in her eyes both for her own feelings at saying goodbye to Ginika and for her Kate who she knew was feeling it a lot. She heard Ginika say, "Now you make sure Caroline rings me the moment your waters break or you are admitted to hospital, I will be there as fast as I can."

"Bye Mum, thanks for this week; hopefully we'll see you soon for our wedding. I love you and I know Caroline does too." One last hug and she walked away to join Caroline.

Kate continued to tear up long after they boarded the plane. Caroline kept quiet, simply holding her hand allowing her the time to feel the loss of leaving her mother behind.

Later into the flight Caroline told Kate, "Your mum said something to me just before we left." "What?"

"She said, you can call me' Iya' if you'd like to Caroline, the affectionate term for mother in Nigerian."

Kate laughed, "Not quite so affectionate when I was a kid! She'd say Iya isn't pleased with you Katherine. But that's nice isn't it darling?"

"Well, I've got my own mother, but, yes, I think I'd like that."

Caroline then became lost in her thoughts. Many times during the week she'd asked herself why things were the way they were between her and her mother. How come Kate's mum was so open and supportive. It's wasn't because Celia didn't love her, she knew that, so she could only conclude that it was because she had lived such a sheltered and insular life compared to Ginika and she had lived vicariously through Caroline. Hence it made it almost too much to bear when she thought her almost perfect daughter was going to lose respect and status. Deep down she really did want the best for her; however her best and Caroline's were two different things.

 **Getting Closer**

As the weeks went by, life fell into a relatively comfortable pattern. They had a good tenant in Kate's house and John had finally signed all the papers to transfer ownership of the house to them. The effect of this was that they heard far less from him and he had stopped coming to the house except to pick Lawrence up or drop him off.

Kate had only one more week of school left. At thirty two weeks, their doctor had advised her to stop work as she would need to be well rested and ready for an early delivery. Caroline however had to try to soldier on as Principal; not easy when all you could think of was whether Kate was OK or not; dream of walking down the street with two little babies in their pram; imagining people saying 'how many children do you have Caroline? "Four; two boys and two girls." She was so excited.

"I _kiss_ , am so excited, _kiss_ I can hardly concentrate, _kiss_ at work, _kiss_ , the school is really, _kiss_ running itself, _kiss._ " Caroline whispered as she moved from lips to neck to breasts. Kate moaned with pleasure but then pulled her back up to her face. "Just hold me Caroline; I feel a bit shaky tonight."

"What's the matter?" asked with no small amount of concern.

"I don't really know. I keep thinking about all the things that could go wrong, you know all those 'scenarios' the doctor and midwife have warned us about."

Caroline stroked her face and pulled her body close. "Nothing like that is going to happen, they have to tell us the risks you know that. Everything will be alright, don't worry sweetheart. The last scan was perfect, and they're kicking you half to death."

Kate turned over and Caroline moved in behind and put her arms and legs around her in the protective way she loved. Soon they were asleep.

They had decided on a low key wedding. They had found a celebrant and decided to put a small marquee in the garden. Caroline had insisted on a wedding organiser as she didn't want Kate getting stressed. They had invited any immediate family including aunts and cousins and some colleagues from school and their own friends from Oxford and Durham. Kate had decided she would invite Greg; after all he was one of her oldest friends and had given them this chance at a family. No-one needed to know about their connection.

Ginika was able to get a week off and so she would spend a few days with them before the wedding. She had given them a surprise present when they got back from America. Kate had phoned the baby store and asked them to go ahead and order their pram and capsules. When she had tried to pay, they told her that her mother had already paid for them. Kate shook her head 'just like mum; she doesn't forget details'; Kate remembered telling her about the store they'd been to, to buy everything.

Celia hadn't commented when they told her, but neither had she shown a great deal of enthusiasm. Caroline was calm and composed about it, Gillian's words ringing in her ears, 'she's got more to lose than you.'

There were two days to go. Caroline had taken them off school to help with the final preparations. They had ended up with a guest list of about sixty.

"God Kate, I didn't know we knew so many people between us.

Along with the other staff members who'd been invited, Beverley was beside herself with excitement and quietly credited herself with aiding the relationship. She was totally devoted to Caroline and Kate was the one who had pulled her boss out of her misery.

Their house was now full as William and his girlfriend Roxy were home too.

In bed that night Caroline looked lost in her thoughts. "What are you thinking?" Kate asked.

"I'm just comparing my life now with what it was like just eighteen months ago. There were so many times this home wasn't a particularly happy place. I guess the buzz of this weekend just brings it home." Kate adored her vulnerable and gentle Caroline.

The big day arrived. Kate couldn't believe how nervous she was. The marquee looked amazing and the caterers had pulled out all the stops to put on something special. The celebrant was herself a gay woman and between the three of them they had come up with a lovely ceremony for the wedding.

This was it. The tenderness both women expressed as they exchanged their vows and promised a lifetime of love and care for each other was palpable to those in the room. Because all of their guests were close to them there was hardly a dry eye in the house.

The celebrant pronounced them spouses for life and as they kissed there was an explosion of applause

The meal and celebration continued with all the trimmings. Instead of formal speeches, William had simply opened the floor for people to say something. Caroline shot a sideways look at him as he certainly hadn't run this past her! Some people gave heartfelt little speeches and others were very witty and took all kinds of liberties, especially about Caroline and work. Both women felt very loved and special.

Celia and Alan were sitting in the sun, and as they looked at each other Alan said;"Well Celia who would have thought that our two little families would have grown this big in the last couple of years. We've been through a lot of ups and downs but we're all still together." Celia still had little to say.

As the afternoon wore on, Gillian noticed that every moment they could, Kate and Caroline would look lovingly at each other, hold hands if they were close and touch each other if they passed. She felt a deep sense happiness for her step-sister and Kate and resolved that she would make an effort to build a more committed relationship with Robbie.

At one moment during the day, for a fleeting moment, Caroline had realised that John wasn't there and for the first time she had no sense of obligation. It felt good to be in that space and she congratulated herself on getting there.

Greg was thrilled to see Kate glowing with pregnancy. "Kate, I'm so pleased for both of you. I know it's going to be hard when they're born; you know, not having any access to them. But I don't regret it."

"Greg, just give it time, once we've settled as a new family, we can talk about it all."

As it got later, people started to leave and the caterers to pack up. Once they'd said goodbye to all their guests, Caroline said their goodnights to the family; she was keen to get Kate off her feet, she'd had a long day. She was also keen to get her into bed. Her need to be alone with her new wife was overwhelming her. She just wanted to tell her, "this is the best day of my life."

The next morning, Kate quietly got out of bed to go downstairs to make herself a cup of tea. She left her new wife sleeping soundly, her tousled hair and naked body still as it was after their love making the night before.

Soon after pouring her own tea, her mother walked in and they sat up at the bench together discussing the wedding and how much everyone seemed to enjoy it.

"Mum will you go and see dad while you are here? You know just for old time sake. He may not have much longer; I'm hoping he'll stay well enough for us to take his grandchildren to see him."

"You're so faithful to him darling. But you know, it's more than twenty years now since your father and I divorced. Even though we've always been civil to each other, it may upset him if I go, especially if he's not sure who I am."

"I suppose you're right." Kate said with a tinge of sadness. It had shaken her when they split up as she adored both of them and they'd always put her happiness first. It also made her think of Richard. She soon cast that aside and thought about how sure she was that nothing like that would happen to her and Caroline. It was very comforting.

Soon the kitchen was buzzing with people; the kids were all up and hoeing into their cereal. Even Celia had come over to see them all and have a cup of tea. Caroline had walked in to the kitchen looking a little crestfallen. When she woke up she'd turned over hoping to cuddle into Kate; however the bed was empty. Kate kissed her on the cheek and whispered "Sorry darling, bladder, heartburn, thirsty; you name it I've had it this morning. I'll make it up to you when they've all disappeared. Caroline poured herself a cup of tea and then held up an empty milk bottle; "No milk for me then I see."

"Caroline, we've run out of milk; I'm just going to pop out and get some. I can drop the boys off on the way."

"You're going nowhere, my darling we're not taking any chances – these two could come any time now." She said as she rubbed Kate's tummy. "If we need milk, I'll get it later. Mum always has spare."

 _A/N - Now you've finished this chapter you may realize that I have borrowed little bits of text from a couple of my other stories. Simply because I like what I'd written and it fits well - no point re-inventing the wheel as it were._


	10. Chapter 10

**In the Beginning – Chapter Ten**

 **The Intervention**

 _I always thought SW gave Celia a 'get out of jail card'. She got rid of Kate and brought the baby's father in. All she had fought about she won; she never had to face up to her negativity and hurtfulness. Caroline got all the pain - again! She won't get away with it that easily here._

Caroline walked back into the house having safely delivered her sons to their destinations and picked up some milk. Kate and Iya were in the lounge talking; she could hear their soft words and gentle laughter. It lifted her spirits in one way but saddened her in another; the longer Ginika stayed the more obvious the divide between her love for Kate and Caroline, and Celia's steely determination to stay detached from what was going on, became.

"Is that you Caroline?" "Yep, I'll be there in a second."

"Kate, I'm going to leave you two for a while now. I've promised to pop round and see Celia this morning and I'm sure you would like some time to yourselves." She passed Caroline in the hall and gave her an impromptu kiss. "Have a nice few hours together; I'm going next door."

Ginika took a deep breath and knocked on Celia's door. Celia let her in and asked her to sit down.

"Is Alan not here Celia?" "No he's gone to see his old friend Harry; he'll be a while yet."

"Good, it means you and I have time for a nice chat together." Celia smiled but the smile covered the fact that she'd been expecting this and wasn't exactly looking forward to it. After exchanging a few pleasantries and having the inevitable cup of tea, Ginika changed the subject and launched into what she had really gone there for.

"You know I married Kate's father when I was still quite young, he was twenty years my senior but I was dazzled by his intelligence I think Celia. We were happy for quite a while and we tried hard to have children. After two miscarriages I had Katherine." Ginika stopped talking for a while to assess how Celia was taking the information. She didn't speak, but she was taking it in.

"Kate was the apple of both our eyes. She was a great kid; intelligent, happy, creative but above all gentle and kind. I was proud of her as she grew up; she made her father and me very happy. It was hard for her when we eventually separated and divorced and I went back to America."

"How did she take the fact that you were leaving her behind?" Celia stepping in thinking she may have found an Achilles heel in this otherwise perfect mother.

"Oh it was her choice all the way. I was offered at job at Columbia and I wouldn't have taken it unless Kate was happy or would come with me. She was at Durham and she wanted to stay behind. It worked well for us, we were always in touch and she came to New York whenever she could."

"Well I don't think I could be away from Caroline like that, Oxford was far enough away for me. I used to count the days to her coming home; even if only for a weekend. My marriage wasn't happy at all and she was the one thing that kept me going."

"Yes. Caroline did tell me a bit about her father and his playing around. I'm sorry to hear that Celia, it must have been tough for you. My husband on the other hand had affairs with his books and his study. Once we had Kate, he lost interest in being married I think."

"Well at least he wasn't mucking around and humiliating you."

"No I guess not." This was the moment Ginka knew she must say what she needed to; the small talk had to finish.

"Celia, I love my daughter very much as I know you love yours. They're all we've both got; they and our grandchildren. I want Kate to be happy; that's all I've ever wanted for her. I didn't really take to her husband but she assured me that she loved him and he was a good man. So I embraced him and tried to get on with him."

"Well, yes I do love Caroline and you may or may not have had the pleasure of meeting the nit wit that she married. But that's what we do isn't it? We accept them and get on with life."

"Now, I've never seen Kate so happy. She loves Caroline so much and I can see why. I love Caroline, she's becoming like another daughter to me and I'm calm and content knowing that these babies of ours are going to have two wonderful mothers."

"Yes, but no father."

"Well that's true. I agree a child should know its father if possible. But life isn't always straightforward and two loving mothers is what our grandchildren will have; and two older brothers who will hopefully be male role models for them.

Celia, it hurts me to see how you treat Kate. I can't tell you how to treat your own daughter although God knows, she's hurting a lot right now. My daughter is a sweet and gentle person she wouldn't hurt anyone knowingly and Caroline has told me that it's Kate who stops her from getting angry with you; who is always pleading your cause and telling Caroline to be patient. I don't understand what she's done to you to make you treat her with the obvious indifference you do, apart from marry your daughter."

"Well that's just it. She's married my daughter, my daughter who is a highly regarded Principal and educator; who is admired by her colleagues and bosses. Who stands to lose a lot of that because she's making herself a public spectacle. Flaunting this so called marriage in everyone's faces; she'll be marching down the street next with two babies that aren't even hers. It's ridiculous and I can't pretend I think it's alright."

"Don't you want Caroline to be happy?"

"Of course I do, but she'll not be happy when this all blows up in her face and the sex stops being great." Ginika looked shocked. "Oh don't look at me like that; they're at it like rabbits at the moment but it won't last and then what? Our Caroline will be saddled with two small children to provide for the rest of their lives."

Ginika felt the anger rising in her. How dare this woman speak about her daughter like this as if she was some money grubbing tart. She was beginning to see the intransience that Caroline spoke of.

"I think this conversation is over Celia. I'm not going to fight with you. However neither will I let you hurt my daughter; I shall do everything in my power to encourage them to come to New York. I can get Caroline a top job. Lawrence can come to school there if he wishes, and I'll help them bring up the babies."

Celia sat stone faced and silent. Ginika left and crept quietly into the house and up to her room. She needed to calm down and relax. She couldn't afford to let Kate see her like this.

 **Taking it all in**

Kate and Caroline had been lying on the sofa together since Ginika left.

"Yesterday was perfect Caroline, I was so nervous; I don't even know why really. I've never wanted anything more in my life."

Caroline kissed the top of her head. "If you'd asked me even twelve months ago if I thought it would all get to this, I would have told you 'nope'; but here I am and I couldn't be happier"

"Why did you think like that?"

"Just not on my radar not until I realised that I was in love with you; I suppose I kept thinking it was like a grown up crush. If anything I thought you'd be the one to end it; taking on all my agenda and baggage. I just assumed you'd run a mile."

"What about my baggage? God me wanting a child and wanting you to have it with me at your age; I really thought you'd walk away that night I told you."

"Well thank God we didn't and here we are my beautiful wife." Caroline put her hand under Kate sweater and onto her stomach; she loved to feel her babies moving and kicking. It was somewhat surreal for her; this was so different to when she had the boys; to feel so connected to her babies, but not be carrying them; hard to comprehend.

"When I woke up this morning and you weren't there I couldn't really take in the momentary feeling I had. In my half asleep state, I felt a horrible dread. I didn't tell you this at the time, but a couple of weeks ago, I had a bad, very bad dream that you died. I lost you. It was really vivid, and it took me all morning to shake it off. I could hardly concentrate at work."

"Caroline; why didn't you tell me?"

"Because, because I didn't want to frighten you; I could hardly bear to think about it then, let alone talk about it."

"Well I'm here, I'm not going anywhere. These two," pressing Caroline's hand more firmly on her tummy;"need both of us." Kate pulled Caroline's face gently into hers and kissed her.

They stayed together on the sofa for quite some time; talking, kissing and revelling in the feeling of being married.

Caroline called up the stairs, "Iya, are you up there? Would you like some lunch?"

"Yes thanks Caroline, I'll be down in a moment."

Kate was busy putting a salad together and setting the table; Ginika walked in and when she looked up at her, Kate knew there was something wrong. Her mother's face had always been an open book.

"Mum, what's the matter?"

"Nothing darling, why would there be?"

"I know you, something has upset you, what's happened?"

Ginika's eyes filled with tears; she tried hard to deflect their concerns but neither woman was going to let it rest. Then, in an instant, Caroline knew the likely cause.

"You've been with my mother haven't you?"

"Yes, yes we spent a couple of hours together."

"Well, what did she say? It's obviously something that upset you."

"Oh you know I tried to talk to her about Kate, to explain to her that my daughter is no threat to you or her; she's a good and gentle person. She wasn't able to accept what I had to say. She just wouldn't or couldn't respond. I'm ashamed to say Caroline that I walked out on her after threatening to encourage you two to come to New York."

"Right! That's it. I'm not standing for this."

"Caroline darling, please wait to talk to her when you are calmer."

"No Kate. My terms this time. You've given her enough benefit of the doubt." With that Caroline stormed out of the kitchen door.

"I'm sorry Kate, I shouldn't have said anything."

"Mum, don't blame yourself; Celia is a hard nut to crack. I just don't want my marriage to Caroline to be the cause of an irretrievable breakdown."

"How can you be the cause of it? You've done nothing wrong. She's an old bitch."

"Mum! That's not like you."

"Yes well even old lionesses can get feisty if their cub is threatened."

 **The Final Showdown**

Caroline tapped on the window and as Celia looked up she knew trouble was on its way. She got up slowly and let her daughter in.

"Mum! What the hell have you been saying to Ginika?"

"Just the truth. No-one seems to want to face the truth. All this dancing around pretending that everything is lovely. It's not what people really think Caroline. They just won't tell you."

Caroline sat down and put her head in her hands; sitting that way for some moments. "I don't know what else I can say mum. I've told you that this is what I want. I've told you how happy I am. I've told you that nothing is going to stop me from being with Kate; forever."

"Well love, you'll just have to accept the consequences. I won't condone it."

"Ok then there's nothing left to say except we're going; as soon as the babies are old enough to travel, we'll go to America. In the meantime, stay away from us mum. Keep away from Kate when I'm at work. If you need to come to the house for anything, ring first. You're not welcome anymore."

"Caroline, please don't say that."

"Sorry, that's the way it is. Your own fault. Now I'm going home for lunch." With that she left the flat; not looking back; not seeing Celia's distraught face.

Caroline walked into the kitchen, her face flushed and shaking. Kate jumped up from the table and pulled her close. Caroline allowed herself to be held for a few moments and then said. "You two have lunch, I just need some space for a while." With that she went upstairs.

 **Gillian**

Caroline lay on their bed trying to take in all that had just transpired. It was beyond her to understand why her mother was behaving like this. She'd seen her stubborn side many times and had to deal with her moods but this was something else. Suddenly her phone rang. She saw it was Gillian.

"Hi what's up?"

"Caroline what the hell is up with Celia? She's just phoned me dad bawling her eyes out saying summat about not being allowed to go to the house anymore."

"That's right, she's not." a resurgence of anger filled Caroline.

"What's goin' on?"

Caroline explained what had happened and how upset Kate's mum was. "Gillian, I can't for the life of me fathom why my mother is being like this; it's getting worse. I can't let Kate get hurt. I can take it for me, but not Kate, especially not in her state."

"Bloody hell Caz, I thought she'd come round once you were married."

"Well she hasn't. God Gillian, I've only been married a day and this is the shit I have to deal with. I knew we should have gone away for a few days but we didn't want to leave Ginika."

"How many days has she got left with you?"

"She leaves tomorrow."

"Well, why don't you two take off for a few days, somewhere nice? Just forget about it for a bit. Lawrence can spend a bit of time with his dad."

"I can't Gillian; I have to go back to work tomorrow. Don't forget I'll be taking maternity leave for a few weeks when the babies arrive. I can't have any more time off."

"Yes you can. Tell 'em yer sick or summat, just do it." Caroline sighed. She did have a point. They wouldn't be able to go far in case Kate went into labour; but the thought of a few days alone was very tempting.

"Caroline, just be careful me dad doesn't get too upset won't you? You know with 'is heart and everything."

"I will Gillian, don't worry. I think I might take up your suggestion. I'll ring Beverley and tell her I need the rest of the week off. I've got loads of leave so I'll just do it."

"Okay, well take it easy, don't get yourself all uptight. Leave Celia and me dad on their own for a bit; he might be able to talk some sense into her. You've got me on your side so I'll try my best too; see if we can't bring her round."

"Okay, thanks." Caroline hung up and suddenly felt the dark clouds melting. Just the thought of being alone with her new wife for several days was enough to bring on the silver lining. She got up off the bed and went to tell Kate.


	11. Chapter 11

**In the beginning – Chapter Eleven**

 **Leaving**

"What shall I do Alan? They're leaving now." Celia called to Alan in the garden. She could see that Caroline was loading Ginika's luggage into the car; she also noticed extra luggage going in and Lawrence with a rather large holdall.

"Well, what do you want to do?"

"Why is Caroline loading all that extra luggage Alan? What's going on?"

"I don't know Celia, all I know is that Ginika is going back to New York today, they must be taking her to the airport."

"Oh I don't know if I should go and say goodbye. It might look bad if I don't. What do you reckon?"

"Has it ever occurred to you that after yesterday, she might not want to see you?"

She shook her head and walked through the gate to the front of the house. Caroline was just putting the last few things in and helping Kate into the car.

"Hello, are you speaking to me?"

"Have I got anything to say?" she made no eye contact as she walked round to the driver's side.

"I thought I'd better come and say goodbye to Ginika. What's all this extra luggage?"

"Nothing you need worry about."

Ginika came out of the house at that moment and walked over to the car. She stopped when she saw Celia.

"Celia, I'm off now. Take care of yourself." And with that she got into the car, not looking back. Celia was stunned that she sidestepped her the way she did. Now too Caroline was going somewhere and she didn't have a clue where. She could feel a sense of panic rising in her.

"Where are you off to Lawrence?"

"To dads for a few days."

"Well where's your mother going?"

"Dunno." And with that he got in the car. He had been given strict instructions by his mother that he was not to tell Celia anything. She had his number if there was an emergency and he could ring Caroline if need be."

The car drove out and Celia stood alone and desolate.

As she walked around to her flat, she peered into Caroline's kitchen. Everything was tidied up and all the blinds were down and doors closed. It was obvious they weren't coming back today.

Alan had put the kettle on and as she walked in he offered to make her a cup of tea. While he understood what Caroline was doing; blamed his wife for her own problems; he couldn't help but feel sorry that she was so upset. It was his job to look after her; he did say 'for better or worse' and this would have to rate as one of the worst times of his wife's recent life.

They had their cup of tea in an uncomfortable silence. Celia picked up her mobile phone and rang Caroline's number. 'The mobile phone you are calling is either switched off or unavailable' the recorded message whined at her. She turned it off and threw it on the table. Alan buried his face in The Guardian.

Next she tried another possibility;

"Gillian, this is Celia."

"Hiya; are you alright, what's up is it me dad?"

"No love, he's fine, he's having a cup of tea. Do you know where Caroline's gone?"

"No, sorry, I just know they were taking Kate's mum to the plane." Gillian could say that in all honesty. She knew they'd gone away for a few days because Caroline had phoned her to say thank you for encouraging it; but she had no idea where they had actually gone.

"Well they've gone somewhere, Lawrence has been shipped off to John and they filled up the car with luggage. I can't believe she would do that and not tell me. What if I need to speak to her?"

"Well Celia, they might have gone on a little honeymoon. Folk don't usually tell anybody where they're going do they?"

"But she could have told me that couldn't she?"

"She might think you're not interested."

Celia knew by this comment that Gillian must know about their problems. Everyone seemed to be scheming against her.

"Alright love, never mind. Tata."

"She knows something Alan but she's not telling me."

"Let it go Celia. If we need Caroline for anything we can ask Lawrence to ring her."

Caroline dropped Lawrence off first. Ginika had offered for him and Angus to go to New York for a holiday, if he saved up. He had been quite excited and they had already begun planning and scheming.

At the airport Ginika pleaded with them not to come in; to just drop her and say goodbye. Kate wasn't at all keen but gave in, and whilst there were tears, it wasn't so hard as she knew that her mother would be back within a few weeks; as soon as she went into labour.

Once Ginika was out of sight and the waving finished, Caroline leaned over and kissed Kate. "Let the honeymoon begin."

 **Arriving**

She had booked a hotel in the Lake District. A little further than she had been comfortable with, but its where Kate wanted to go. They were shown to a large room with a view overlooking Lake Windermere. It was a lovely day and the sunlight was streaming in. Kate opened the large window and filled the place with fresh air. Off to the right was a lovely view of Scafell in the distance. She and some of her University friends had been here a few times for walking holidays. She loved the area.

While her wife enjoyed the view and lost herself in memories, Caroline busied herself unpacking all their things and hanging up the clothes. As soon as Kate turned round Caroline walked over to her. "Happy honeymoon my darling."

Kate gently pulled her face close and their lips met; Caroline could feel all the tension of the last twenty four hours start to dissipate; nothing was going to take away the joy of these days. "My mum told me something that she didn't tell you." Kate whispered.

"What?'

She started to giggle; "she said that Celia told her we were 'at it like rabbits'."

"What! God, how dare she say that." Then she saw Kate laughing and she relaxed into the funny side of it. "She's not wrong is she? Actually we're breeding like them too."

"I'd like to throw you on the bed now Caroline McKenzie-Dawson and jump on top of you and do all manner of interesting things in never before tried positions. Alas, my lump, you know, it's really in the way at times like this."

"Oh I can think of a few things we could try from different angles."

"Yes but lowering me on to the bed to start with is a bit of a turn off don't you think?"

"Who said anything about lowering you on to the bed, maybe I have other ideas."

A long deep kiss followed; one that spoke of desire, commitment; adoration even. Then, surprisingly, "come on get your boots on the weather is notorious here it could be peeing down in an hour."

"Kate, what are you talking about?"

"I want to take you out walking while the sun's shining."

"Walking? But I had other ideas."

"I know, but we have hours of evening to spend trialling all your new ideas."

Caroline muttered to herself and pouted but it made no difference, she pulled on her socks and boots (that Kate had made her buy on the way in) and out they went.

"Where are we going?"

"I want to show you something, and complete something." All very mysterious.

They walked for about half an hour, Caroline holding firmly on to Kate's hand; they came to a gate in a dry stone wall and followed a path up the hill for some way. "Here, it's here, what I want to show you." Suddenly they came to a beautiful spot looking out over the lake with the stark peaks surrounding them. She found an old decrepit bench with a rusted sign on the back saying this bench had been donated to the National Park by the Benson family in 1975.

"Come and sit here with me." she patted the bench and as Caroline sat beside her, Kate leaned into her shoulder; Caroline put her arm around her and held her secure.

"I told you we came here as students a few times; well I found this spot when I was out waking on my own one day. I came back several times; I was so overcome with the beauty of it Caroline and it gave me a sense that there was something or someone special waiting for me in life. I used to sit and daydream about what it might be."

Caroline listened carefully to what she was saying. Kate never ceased to amaze her; she was far deeper than she was.

"I wanted to come back here when I knew that I'd found whatever it was I was supposed to. That's why I wanted to come here with you. Finish it; finish the dream." They sat quietly contemplating the beauty and the oneness.

As they walked away, Caroline asked;

"Why didn't you come here with Richard and finish it?"

"Oh you know, he wasn't that kind of bloke; not really romantic. I don't think he would have found it touching. Remember he was a very pragmatic solicitor type – you know, his life was compartmentalised. Anyway, despite the fact that I loved him, I never had that strong deep feeling that he was my soul mate. Now I've met mine, I know I was right to feel that way."

"You've never told me where you met him."

"Oh I used to help out with tutoring at an African support centre in the city. He did some pro bono legal work. It was a centre run by Africans for Africans.

Caroline took some time to compute what Kate had just implied. "Are you saying Richard was African?"

"Well his mother was Nigerian, his father was English like mine; so we're both mixed race."

"I didn't know that; you've never mentioned it before."

"Well it's normal for me so I suppose I didn't think. Does it matter?"

"No; no of course not."

They returned to the hotel after walking some more and exploring the local village. They had found a pub that had an interesting menu and booked a table for the evening.

"That walk has made me feel like a long hot bath Kate."

"Sounds like a great idea."

Caroline had made sure that the room had a large spa bath in it; she had thought things through and decided it would make for some easier love making given Kate's difficulty moving around and the weight she was carrying. She filled it up and added some fragrant gel which was supposed to be a soothing concoction. She helped Kate to lower herself into the water and then slid in behind her. Kate lay back into Caroline's waiting arms and as her head rested on her chest; she could feel her heart beating. Caroline pushed the button and the spa flew into action bubbling around them, soothing out all their tension.

Caroline began to kiss Kate's face and neck and lick her ears; this had the effect of nearly sending Kate mad. She managed to caress every part of her wife's body slowly and gently bring her to the moment she always loved; when Kate whispered,

"Take me Caroline." Permission to possess.

The bath was large enough for them to move around and Kate was able to reposition herself so that she could make love to her wife. It was luxurious, slow, and intimate, in every way. For Caroline the sex was mind blowing, it usually was; but today it was a far deeper experience. She was filled with such strong emotions; the words 'soul mate' swirling around as if yes, the universe really had brought them together; against all the odds.

Kate leaned back against Caroline and sighed. "Who would have thought when I sat on that bench all those years ago; this is how I would finish it? It's beyond my wildest dreams."

"Are any of those friends you were here with still together?"

"Two are yes. But the others, no, like me and Greg, it was a temporary thing. They split up during the last year we were at Durham. Greg and I are the only ones who've stayed close friends."

"Good job you did eh?" she stroked Kate's tummy as she said this.

"Kate, I want to say something, I hope you won't take offence."

"What? Go on then."

"I've been thinking about Richard and Greg, and I am glad Greg is well, you know, white."

"Caroline; why on earth would you say that?"

"Selfishly, because our girls will look more like ours; you know a mixture of you and me."

Kate smiled and stroked her face. "That doesn't offend me my darling, but you know, I'm not a bit concerned about what they look like. I know they'll take on so much of you as they grow up and that thrills me."

The three days they had went quickly. They were blessed with good weather most of the time and were able to do short walks each day and investigate several lovely villages. They bought a few cute baby outfits, and Caroline bought Gillian a pair of floral wellies as a gift for pushing her into this.

Check out came far too soon for them but they were grateful for the wonderful alone time they'd managed; they left the hotel feeling deeply in love.


	12. Chapter 12

**Final Chapter.**

 _This is the last chapter of this little story. Again I ask your understanding in that there is a little bit of story from "Choices' - but it suits me to use it. If you want to know more of their life now, you'll find it with 'Ora and Ace'. Thanks for your interest. This love story had such potential; we lost it on the TV show but not in this place - Thank Goodness. It's great that whenever we need a C & K fix, there are so many wonderful missives we can turn to. Mills and Boon strike again in this chapter. Ah well, that's the way I am._

 **Returning**

Caroline turned into the drive and noticed the lights on in the house. She helped Kate out of the car and put the key in the front door. Lawrence opened it from inside with a sheepish look on his face.

"Oh you're home Lawrence?"

"Yes, dad just brought me." A familiar figure appeared behind Lawrence. "Hi, Caroline; just dropping Lawrence off."

"Yes well thanks for that. We're here now." She couldn't contemplate dealing with him today. Kate walked straight past him into the house; she was bursting for a pee.

He lingered at the door; nothing was forthcoming and so he smiled benignly at his son and left. Lawrence helped his mum to carry all the stuff inside.

"Mum?"

"Yes?"

"Granny's phoned me like ten million times while you've been away."

"Why? Whatever would she do that for?"

"She just kept asking me if I'd heard from you; asking me if I knew where you were; then wanting to know when you were coming back."

"Oh well I'm here now so don't worry about it. Have you had a good time with your dad?"

"Yea it was OK but I'm glad you're home. Is Kate OK mum?" She tousled her son's hair and kissed the top of his head. "Yes she's fine." He smiled at her and then walked back into the lounge.

The two women sat at the kitchen bench making contingency plans for Caroline going back to work. She was getting concerned about being away from Kate with her so close now; they were both on notice that their babies could come at any time.

The house phone rang and Caroline went to pick it up. "Hello. Yes mum, we're back. We've been on our honeymoon. No mum, I'm sorry. Kate's quite tired and I'm trying to organise everything for me to go back to work tomorrow. Another time. Bye."

"Wow, you really are putting the screws on aren't you?" Kate asked with concern.

"No, I'm just standing by my wife and my marriage. That's not unthinkable is it?"

"No I suppose not; but Caroline please be careful that you don't take this to the point where there is a complete breakdown. You will regret it if you do."

The next morning was agony for Caroline. She ushered Lawrence into the car and then came back to the door for a final kiss and hug. "Don't forget, ring me often otherwise I'll just fret all day."

"Ok darling, I'll be just fine; now go or else you're going to be late."

This pattern of morning farewells carried on for nearly another four weeks. Kate was enormous; despite being tall and slim; her belly had swollen to so much it was difficult to get around. She was at the point now where every morning all she hoped for was that this would be the day. Her doctor was amazed that she was holding them this long.

Caroline had relented a little and Celia had been around a couple of times. The conversation was rather clipped but the snide remarks had stopped; it was still all rather superficial. Caroline kept a tight rein on her visits and the topics of conversation.

 **Babies are fundamental**

About two hours into the morning, Kate was finishing tidying the kitchen. Suddenly she looked down to see a pool of water on the floor and around her ankles. "Jesus, God, this is it" she screamed out. Her head knew there was no-one there to hear her, but the sound was involuntary. She was overcome with a feeling of panic; something, she told herself regularly, would not and could not happen. Where the hell was her wife when she needed her?"Take it easy Kate, Caroline's at work. She'll come soon." Somehow the rationalisations did not soothe her. She found herself, as if in an out of body experience, leaving the kitchen, floating through the back door and ending up at Celia's flat. The unconscious need for human contact at this moment was overwhelming. She banged hard on the window. Celia emerged from the kitchen. The moment she saw Kate, she knew exactly what was happening. "Celia, I think my waters have broken." Celia grabbed her and pulled her into the flat. "Sit down here. What do you want me to do Kate?"

At that moment Kate was hit with the first contraction. Her eyes rolled as she felt the excruciating pain. "Caroline, get Caroline."

Celia picked up the phone and dialled Caroline's number. No answer. She didn't dare tell Kate that. She quickly redialled the school number. "Put me through to the Principal's secretary quickly please. Beverley? Its Caroline's mum here. Where is she she's not answering her phone and Kate's gone into labour?"

"Give me one minute Celia, hold on." Beverley rushed out into the corridor. Caroline had been baled up by a staff member on her way back from the bathroom. "Caroline! Quickly , your mother's on the phone, it's Kate."

Caroline ran into her office and grabbed the phone. "Mum, what's happening?"

"It's alright love, don't worry, Kate's here. Her waters have broken and she's just had her first contraction. Shall Alan and I drive her to the hospital?"

"No mum. Call an ambulance straight away. Then go to the house and get her bag. It's in our bedroom, a red one in the corner. Give it to them to bring with her. Can you give the phone to Kate for a minute?" Celia handed the phone to Kate; then shouted, "Alan, ring an ambulance will you?"

"Kate darling, mum's ringing an ambulance. Hold on you'll be Ok. I'm leaving right now and I'll meet you there. I love you." " Hurry Caroline, I need you."

Kate handed the phone back to Celia. "Thanks mum. Will you go in the ambulance with her?"

"Of course I will; now don't you worry."

"Beverley, can you please find Lawrence and tell him what's happened. He's to go home with Angus; Jane is expecting this and he'll stay there. Oh, and Beverley, tell him not to worry and that I'll ring him."

"Will do; now you get going I'll sort out everything here. Let me know when they're born won't you?" "Yes of course. Thanks." On the way to the hospital she rang Ginika who said she'd had a bag packed for a week and would be on the first available flight.

Fifteen minutes later, the paramedics turned up and checked Kate out and then helped her into the ambulance. Celia walked in with her, carrying the red bag. The ambulance officer said, "Who are you dear?" There was no hesitation. "Kate's my daughter in law."

Twenty minutes later they arrived at the maternity unit. Caroline arrived at the same time. The paramedics took Kate straight through to the delivery suite while Caroline went to the desk to sort out the admission paperwork.

The ward clerk threw some forms at Caroline and told her to fill them in. Caroline duly obeyed and handed them back.

"Next of kin; who is Caroline McKenzie-Dawson?"

"I am."

"Well what relationship are you?"

"Kate's my wife."

"Is it official? Like, are you married? because if you aren't, it has to be a family member." The woman said in her monotonous uncaring voice.

Caroline stared at her; she was desperate to get to Kate. "Now listen to me, my wife is about to deliver our children; now finalise the bloody paperwork or I won't be responsible for what happens!"

The woman glared at her and nodded for her to go in. 'Idiot' Caroline muttered to herself as she strode along the corridor.

Inside the delivery room were the midwife, another nurse and Kate lying on her side on the bed.

"Caroline, come here please." Caroline took her jacket off and went to sit beside her. She stroked Kate's head and kissed her. "It's ok darling, I'm here, we're all here ready, all you have to do is go with it now and do what Carol tells you."

Carol, Kate's midwife smiled at Caroline, "I've phoned Dr Fisher, he should be here soon to check on her. But she's got quite a way to go yet as you can imagine."

Caroline smiled in return and nodded knowingly. The next moment there was another guttural moan as Kate felt the next wave of pain. As soon as she had calmed down, Caroline slipped out of the room into the corridor to ring Gillian.

"Hi there; Kate's in labour we're at the hospital. I was wondering if I could ask you to pick her mother up from the airport. She's on her way."

"Course I can, is Kate alright?"

"So far, so good. Her obstetrician is here on hand and will keep a close eye on her. Ginika just text me to say she's on a flight in the next hour. Could you pick her up from Manchester airport? I'll text you the details."

Caroline returned to Kate's side. "Where the hell have you been, how could you leave me, I'm dying here!" Kate shouted. Caroline and the midwife looked at each other and chuckled.

"Kate, you're not dying, this is what labour is like sweetheart, it's painful, but when it's over and our beautiful babies are here, it will all be forgotten."

"Yeah right" was all she got in return.

At ten o clock, Ginika arrived with Gillian. She knocked on the door and motioned for Caroline to come outside. "Kate, your mum's here, do you want her in here for the delivery?" Kate nodded.

Ginika hugged and kissed Caroline. "How is she sweetheart?"

"She's doing OK, she starting to get very tired but being brave. She'd like you in with us for the delivery."

"Are you ok with that Caroline? It's a very intimate moment you know."

"Yes of course, I'm fine. It will be a precious memory for both of you."

Kate reached out for her mother the moment she walked into the room. They held each other until the next contraction came.

It was now 12 hours since labour started; Kate was becoming very exhausted.

"Caroline, I'm starting to think about a caesarean here, the babies are still OK but Kate is getting very tired." Carol said. "James wants an update in twenty minutes and then we'll look at booking a theatre."

Caroline felt a great sadness coming over her. Kate was desperate to give birth naturally even though James had warned her it may not be possible.

Two minutes later there was a huge scream from Kate, Carol quickly separated her legs and felt her cervix."Oh boy, someone's on their way. She's fully dilated and there's a little head here."

Caroline's heart started racing. This was it. She was breathless with excitement and fear.

"Kate, one of them is here, push now." Kate gave an almighty yell; all the veins in her face were popping out; James rushed in having been summoned by Carol.

"Ok Kate, this is it for number one; another big push." The next moment there was a gurgling cry as a beautiful little person was held up and put onto Kate's chest for a few seconds.

"Come on Caroline, cut the cord so we can focus on getting her sister out."

Through a haze of tears, Caroline cut her baby's cord and then went back to Kate's side. "She's beautiful darling."

A few minutes later there was another scream from Kate; "Come on Kate, one more push and she'll be here." Kate panted as hard as she could and then one more push and out came her other daughter.

The newest arrival was placed on Kate's chest for a few moments and then they were both put in cribs as they needed a little oxygen. One baby weighed in at 7lbs and the other smaller one at 6.

Caroline and Ginika held each other and cried tears of joy and relief; then hugged and kissed an exhausted Kate.

"You two might like to go outside now and have a few moments while we sort Kate out and get her back to her room." Carol suggested. "Before you go though; because they are twins, it helps us a lot if we can have a name for them as we would usually just write 'baby McKenzie'." Caroline quietly corrected her. "McKenzie-Dawson actually."

"We have chosen them Kate said. Could you bring the cribs over here for a moment please?"

Carol wheeled them to the bedside. Both women looked at them. Kate said," The first one born is Flora Elizabeth and the other Grace Abike.

When they got out into the corridor they were confronted by Celia and Alan, Lawrence, William who had just arrived, and Gillian. There was a lot of kissing, hugging and congratulations. It was decided that everyone would go back to Caroline and Kate's place so they could settle in and have something to eat. Caroline would be staying overnight at the hospital.

Alan and Celia were allowed in to the nursery to look at them through the window.

Celia felt a surge of emotion. Looking at these tiny beautiful babies she was overwhelmed with the stupidity of her behaviour and how close she may have come to having no contact with them. These two little souls were her grandchildren. She had tried telling herself, over and over, that these babies were going to be Caroline's as well, but had struggled to come to grips with it. Looking at them now she just melted. She didn't understand all the technicalities; she didn't want to but she remembered Caroline saying that they had made them together. When Caroline had come out of the room to tell them all, the look of utter joy and happiness on her face was something no-one could ignore; least of all her own mother. How could she have got this so wrong?

As she stood looking at them, she felt an arm come around her shoulder. She looked sideways to see her daughter looking at her. "Thank you mum for putting your feelings aside and looking after Kate 'til she got here." In that moment, they both started to cry. "I'm sorry, very sorry Caroline."

Caroline kicked off her shoes and climbed on to the bed beside Kate; snuggling in to her. "You did it, you're a mum; we're mums!" Kate looked back at Caroline with tired but deeply satisfied eyes.

The nurse wheeled them both in as it was time to try for their first feed. They were exquisite. They had light olive skin and heads full of loose black curly hair. Eyes tightly shut, they snuffled as the nurse handed one to Kate and one to Caroline. They had little wristbands on with their names. Flora and Grace.

"Do you want me to stay while you try to attach them Kate?"

Kate looked at Caroline. "No thanks. Caroline has breastfed two babies, I'm sure she can help me. We'll call you if we have any problems." The nurse smiled and left them.

Caroline reached over and undid Kate's gown, pulling it down to expose her breast. She gently lifted Flora's head and guided her mouth to Kate's now swollen nipple. The baby took a few seconds to realise what she was being offered, but then began to suck. Tears rolled down her face as she watched her wife gaze at her baby with such love and contentment; Grace lay in Caroline's arms; her little eyes opened and she looked up at her mother for an instant; she bent over and kissed her; "I love you, my baby girl."

Kate looked at her wife; "Life doesn't get any better than this moment."

"No. It doesn't."


End file.
